[Western Crossover | Anko] How Can I Survive Gotham With an Intelligence of 1?

You died. But you were lucky enough to get a chance to be reborn. The Dice God, who decides your fate, rolled your character stats for you: Intelligence 1, Luck 95, Appearance 92, Strength 31, Dexterity 48, Constitution 25, Size 44, Willpower 68, Education 97. You fell silent. You were actually a college-educated idiot. The KP in your head scratched his head and said to forget about all that and choose your identity instead. He also gave you three chances to reroll. The identity cards before you were: yet another Batkid, a Batkid's kid (what is this, a super-doubled Batkid?), a Superkid made in a restricted lab, a nonhuman, a Joker's kid (why is this even an option?), a Talon, Deathstroke's kid, a Green Arrow's kid, the League of Assassins, some random Gothamite, a supervillain-in-training, a vigilante-in-training... You looked at your Intelligence stat, then at your app, and said, "Can't I just become a TikTok influencer?" Content Warnings You Need ＊Second-person POV ＊I wrote the whole thing on a whim under the Dice Maiden's influence. If you have questions, ask her! ＊This is an Anko story with only a little of the usual Anko feel, and some *not-so-proper* tabletop RPG elements. The plot is driven by dice, so expect some extremely random and bizarre events, lots of OOC moments, stereotypes, surreal plotlines, lethal doses of memes, and an abundance of terrible colloquial writing influenced by Jiang Nan... ＊It's a crossover hodgepodge universe. This is a silly story to read without thinking too hard. You can think of it as The Lego Movie... ＊The timeline and chain of logic have turned into a ball of yarn that's been mauled by a cat. ＊No CP, because being an idiot is a crime. ＊May contain: the Dihua trope, The Fourth Calamity, and meta elements (no guarantees) ＊Though Minion-Chan's Luck is sky-high, the author's dice luck isn't great... :) ＊The content warnings in Chapter One will be updated whenever needed. Coming soon: Is It Wrong to Work the Night Shift in Gotham? I'm an ordinary wage slave living in Gotham, and I work the night shift all the time. Gas stations, convenience stores, fast-food joints, ice cream shops, cinemas, hospitals... Basically, wherever there's a job, you'll find me. It's all because the night-shift pay is so good! Of course, I'm very professional and love whatever job I'm doing, even though every place I work at ends up going out of business. I don't know why, but there are always a few familiar-looking customers who keep showing up at my workplaces... ＊ A newcomer arrived in Gotham. Normally, this would be no big deal, except that there was absolutely no record of her identity. So Batman devoted a little of his attention to keeping an eye on her. Then he found out that, for some reason, she was always working night shifts. That alone would have been fine, but she kept running into murderers, lunatics, supervillains, and even paranormal incidents, Cthulhu, and aliens... Batman: ... Another upcoming story: I'm Glad You Like Robin Too, and Have Your Own Opinions Other people get bound to a Billionaire System or a Beloved by All System. What on earth is the point of the "Romance System" you're bound to?! "System loading... Bound target: Robin." You know Robin. Isn't that the urban legend from neighboring Gotham? You're not interested in a bird guy wearing shorts! Wait, what do you mean, "Reach 100% romance progress with Robin to receive one hundred million"? Well, in that case, what's there to think about? You've loved Robin since the day you were born. ...But no one told you there were so many Robins! Theme: Dice Maiden, love me one more time