[Western Crossover] Superheroes Mustn’t Litter

The new story [Western Crossover] Batman's Kid, But a Wayne Ancestor is now serializing to rave reviews. Come check it out if you're interested! [Story blurb] You're a trash can. But not just any trash can: you're the trash can of the entire universe. Everything its owners throw away or forget ends up with you. So you often receive: One pair of Kryptonian glasses dropped during a fight by a guy in a red cape who can make instant noodles One set of Sherlock Holmes's middle school textbooks N Batman-shaped throwing stars lost on the streets of Gotham by a local vigilante N keepsakes left behind when a World War II veteran's plane crashed into a glacier Everything is going great until someone breaks in, steals the trash can's core, and forces poor old you to turn into a human. Salvi: ...People still break into trash cans to steal stuff these days??? Salvi, the stolen trash can and furious victim, ends up on the streets of Gotham... until he meets Jason, an eight-year-old local. Salvi thinks: Life was going perfectly fine, and now it's getting even better! Salvi decides to adopt an adopted son who can take care of his adoptive father, land a steady job at Wayne Enterprises, and coast through life. Then he'll catch the damn thief. But before that, It can't hurt to have his adopted son read Sherlock's textbooks and broaden his horizons, right? It can't hurt to use the defective gadgets Batman tossed in the trash to play Batman in Gotham, right? And since I'm Batman now, what's wrong with letting my adopted son make a guest appearance as a little bird? The real Batman: ...Exactly. Little Blue Bird: ...Exactly. And so, Gotham's newspapers often feature: Batman and Bruce Wayne gazing into each other's eyes.jpg Wayne teasing his secretary.jpg Batman rescuing Wayne's secretary at the last second.jpg Two people acting out a love triangle between three people The villains: Gotham's having a steamy winter. Are we part of the show? Some little bird: Why do I have to manage upward, too?! Reader's guide: 1. The timeline is a complete mess. 2. Apologies for any OOC characterization. 3. There will be an absurd number of secret identity jokes. Everyone's a secret identity genius. 4. The Batman pairing is set. [Upcoming story blurb] (The next one I'm writing. Drafting in progress, please add it to your favorites~) (The next one I'm writing. Drafting in progress, please add it to your favorites~) Edmund Wayne, a level-one workaholic The greatest ancestor of the Wayne family, founder of Gotham, master swordsman, chosen of God, ally of the Knights Templar, and lord of the most valuable bay when the Americas were being opened up. After his legendary life came to an end, he woke up again hundreds of years later in Gotham. But Edmund had become... an eight-year-old boy with black hair and blue eyes, dressed in rags. Edmund says: Thanks for asking. I just picked up a newspaper in Crime Alley. Good news: The Wayne family still exists. Bad news: His only descendant, Bruce Wayne, is a womanizing playboy who loves extreme sports and squanders his fortune. Edmund: ...Damn it, a worthless descendant. Red Hood swore he didn't have a weird habit of picking up kids, until he saw a black-haired, blue-eyed child cursing out Gotham's rich. Jason: That's what falling in love feels like. I'm keeping him. Damian meets a new classmate at school. He's black-haired and blue-eyed, rebellious, and a huge admirer of Bruce's adopted sons. Damian isn't impressed. He thinks Edmund is just another kid daydreaming about being adopted by Bruce. Until... Edmund: "Bruce Wayne is useless, wasting his life in drunken debauchery. He'll bring about his own downfall sooner or later." Damian: ...That's what rage feels like. Draw your sword. Bruce receives a diary that belonged to an ancestor of the Wayne family. Then Bruce sees Edmund, in his childhood form. People around him: Look at his black hair and blue eyes! Edmund is your son! Bruce: ...? Did you get that backwards? This is completely out of order. The setting is based on the comic Batman: White Knight, with some changes. Added November 10, 2024 Theme: Don't resist the unexpected, even if it always catches you off guard.