Planeswalker: The War of My Plane

I endured various minor poisonings to get to the middle, but I just couldn't accept the rest. You explained earlier that the fireball spell was as powerful as a mortar, but the monsters that the fireball spell couldn't kill were killed by that liberal woman with a single shot... I feel like you're starting to disrespect my intelligence, so I'm not going to keep watching...

This story boasts a top-tier concept and world-building, which could easily shine in the hands of a master writer. However, aside from these two aspects, everything else is lackluster. The plot is incredibly clichéd, flat, and lacks pacing. The writing is also dry and unengaging. Details are only improved through the protagonist and supporting characters' idiotic absurdity.

I'm starting to dislike this policeman's sister; I'm the kind of person who responds better to gentleness than force.

Writing about foreign countries is just too much; it's disgusting. Female police officers, 78-year-old men—this kind of nerdy fantasy makes me want to vomit. You're using the D&D system, playing with guns, and there's been countless complaints. Please, just Google it; countless people have compared guns to D&D magic. Would it kill you to do some research on this? I read your book in 2000 because I thought you were a reader, but after reading your story, I haven't read web novels for years! Sigh.

Play fewer games and update more; a book lover would have become a master long ago.

That's good; it's the classic isekai (otherworld) genre that I like. However, I have a few suggestions for the author to consider. ① The opening is too bland and verbose, completely deviating from the expected "golden three chapters" beginning. Otherwise, if the author had written a million-word book, I would have dropped it immediately.

A stranger, especially a foreigner, comes up to you, trying to probe your background, take advantage of you, and threaten you. Just because she's a woman doesn't mean the protagonist has to be afraid or intimidated. Please, you have magic, what are you afraid of? Just deny it. If it were a man probing, threatening, and taking advantage of you, do you think he'd survive two chapters? He'd be dead in one chapter, and the author still thinks that's reasonable?

Why would you write about a cunning and treacherous young girl who deprives the male protagonist of his benefits? The protagonist becomes a Planeswalker, but his IQ drops to -50.

The Western Zhou Dynasty + D&D + Amber Flow – just these elements combined already make for a difficult novel to write. Then they add the game-like PvP of a sniper rifle – author, are you just stacking buffs? The elements are numerous, chaotic, and conflicting, diminishing the enjoyment. Combined with this utterly unappealing title… author, you're truly brave…

The opening is off-putting; it's incredibly verbose and rambling. Even warfare involves flanking maneuvers and converging attacks from the center, but this is just a bunch of points everywhere – pure self-indulgence.