High-Risk Set, but I'm a College Intern

Lin Youxi is a fragile Chinese college guy. He transmigrated at the age when he needed an internship certificate most. The good news: the System gave him an internship offer. The bad news: the companies listed on it sounded pretty ominous. “Armed Detective Agency? Why does a detective agency need to be armed?” “Jujutsu High? I don’t want to be a teacher! I haven’t even finished my undergraduate degree!” “Star Religious Group? That sounds a little like a cult, haha. Am I imagining things?” “And they’re all competitors, right? Enemies of one another?” Lin Youxi slowly covered his mouth, lost in thought. “You mean I have to intern at both the Port Mafia and the Armed Detective Agency, while also working part-time as a teacher at the Star Religious Group and Jujutsu High? How is that even, ” “You’ll get an internship certificate.” “I’m in.” This ridiculously fragile college student had never read any of the manga mentioned above, and had no idea that his placements would be: The Yokohama stage, where the scriptwriting faction will run you in circles unless you max out your intelligence. And The Tokyo stage, where you’ll be sent to fight Sukuna and die unless you max out your strength. System: Here’s one point in intelligence and one point in strength. Which will you choose? Naive college student: Huh? I need to bring a brain and a body to my internship? Our reckless college student went out with nothing but his life. He maxed out his life insurance and his health bar, then charged headfirst into worlds where death was part of the setting. When he was being shot, he cheerfully crunched away. “These bullets are pretty crispy.” When he was inside a cursed spirit’s stomach, he lay flat and took a nap. “This air conditioning is pretty energy-efficient.” System: . Sure, these manga worlds are open to anyone with a pulse, but how is your pulse so damn persistent? The Port Mafia got a new intern. According to the organization’s internal forum, on his first morning he got shot in the head by an executive, then by lunchtime he was sharing a table with that executive and spinning the table while the executive ate. That afternoon, his boss, a senior intelligence officer, interrogated him. By evening, he had caught his boss being a spy and turned the tables, keeping his boss dangling while he interrogated him. He was discriminated against when he joined, and the organization wouldn’t even give him a gun. When he left, he walked out with an entire arsenal. The protagonist of an X-point story: don’t bully a young man just because he’s poor. He’ll get revenge before you can turn the page! Lin Youxi, reading the forum gossip, wore a look of disdain. You could at least make up something good. There’s no way an intern could do all that. Then he turned to the System, eyes sparkling: “Can I take this arsenal with me to the next world?” System: Seriously? This guy just blundered through the scriptwriters’ world and made it out alive? Jujutsu High is a training ground for jujutsu sorcerers. It’s on the front lines of producing sorcerers with the power to take on cursed spirits and other monsters. One year, Jujutsu High had three once-in-a-century prodigies among its students And a remarkably ordinary intern teacher. “Teacher, what do you do for work?” “I teach math.” “No, I mean, do you have a cursed technique?” “I teach math.” “Come on, are you serious? Why come to Jujutsu High to teach math? Go teach at a regular school!” The ordinary intern teacher, who seemed to have no cursed energy at all, adjusted his glasses and replied sternly, “Because if you don’t understand math, you really don’t understand it. Once I’ve taught you math, you’ll be able to do anything!” The trio of Gojo, Geto, and Shoko: ??? The trio of prodigies were baffled. And as they stood there baffled, their intern teacher walked up to the lectern. “Gojo... have you learned Taylor expansions yet?” Gojo: ...? What expansions? “What about the central limit theorem? Lagrange’s mean value theorem? And, ” Geto hurriedly stopped the new teacher, whose surroundings were warping with numbers. “Wait, wait, wait! Your domains are overlapping, teacher!” The white-haired boy looked at the many domains unfolding behind the young teacher, his eyes shining. “Math... is truly terrifying.” System: . The System watched him burn the midnight oil over calculus and use Taylor expansions to defeat Sukuna during the day, and by then felt nothing at all. “Could you at least put a few points into strength?” “Don’t stop me from studying advanced math! I have exams when I get back to school!” Fine. If you don’t have enough strength, make up for it with math. After finishing one round of assignments, Lin Youxi still thought he was just working a normal job in an ordinary world. That was until his second rotation sent him straight to his former employer’s rival. Lin Youxi: Seriously? I get to take on my old employer? This is awesome! Hell yeah! Then “Dazai, why did you switch jobs too?” The human sludge smiled. “Because before Youxi left the Port Mafia, he was my subordinate and still walked off with an entire arsenal, so I got fired~” System: . It’s over. This Host is about to get dragged off to the execution grounds. But the System could only watch as the human sludge said one thing and did another, becoming this guy’s external brain. On top of that, two friends Lin Youxi had saved also became his financial and emotional support. System: ? When Lin Youxi jumped from Jujutsu High to the Star Religious Group to cook the books, he discovered that his immediate supervisor was the student who had once turned dark and defected System: . It’s over. This Host is going to collide with the boss and end up at the execution grounds. Instead, it watched its Host hesitantly blunder forward. “I... I taught you better than this. Geto, you’re running a crab cult, of all things. You, ” “Teacher Lin wants a raise?” “I...” “I’ll give you the maximum equity stake.” “I won’t let that corrupt me!” “Teacher Lin is my mentor. Why don’t you take my place as the boss?” “Huh? That doesn’t seem right. I’m just an accountant, you know. Geto, you’re far too generous. Well, if you insist on sitting beside Your Majesty, I suppose I can allow it.” System: ??? Why? No, how? What gives him the right Is it because he’s a **college student?? *The volume labels indicate the worlds. There’s a 30% spoiler barrier, so feel free to skip to whichever volume catches your interest. The order is Bungou Stray Dogs, Jujutsu Kaisen, then Detective Conan. There will be some world-hopping back and forth. *There are jokes and character-bashing, so please be aware. ■Everyone is portrayed as friends, no romance. Preview for “Hello, I’m Here to Work Seriously”: Youxi as an office worker The protagonist is a new graduate. From the moment he started paying into social insurance, he felt that he was different, a new species. He swore he’d become a different species from those foolish college students: a mature, cool-headed, reliable working adult who would make everyone exclaim, “Wow, that’s what you call an adult!” The protagonist is bound to the God-Hand, Devil-Hand System. The System tells him it’s here to help him become mature and professional. With its help, he’ll be able to perform his work perfectly as a godlike newcomer, earning his coworkers’ admiration, his boss’s approval, and everyone’s praise But the System has a slight limitation. Just as its name suggests, it’s the God-Hand, Devil-Hand System. The protagonist has to get five Devil Hands before he can get one God Hand. For example, when the protagonist tries to get coffee for his boss, he spills it all over him. When he’s sent to meet his boss’s business partner, he brings the boss’s enemy back instead. When he goes to battle, he carefully and painstakingly steps on all his comrades’ shoes. After five Devil Hands like these, he finally gets a chance at one God Hand. The protagonist’s boss finally can’t stand his antics anymore. Boss: I’m absolutely firing this guy! Then the organization suddenly falls into crisis, and there’s no one available to help. Just as it looks like the organization is about to collapse, the protagonist, who usually seems clumsy and sleepwalks through work, sleepwalks past, steps on a banana peel, and falls. As he tumbles, his foot happens to kick a soccer ball that came from who knows where. The ball flies straight into the muzzle of the enemy sniper’s rifle, right as everyone else is locked in a tense standoff, unable to do anything. Protagonist: (panda meme, hands tucked in) (sleepwalking past) (What the hell, why did I fall?) (problem solved) Everyone: . Boss: . The boss kept him on after all. Eventually everyone realized that the protagonist had the nature of both a God Hand and a Devil Hand. They were tormented by him, agonized over it, and wanted to strangle him, but at crucial moments he could always bring about a miracle-like reversal. Everyone stared at the protagonist: loving and hating him, trusting and distrusting him at the same time. Protagonist: (completely unaware) Protagonist: (sighing) Damn, I’m working really hard today too. (spills coffee on the boss) (slips in the coffee puddle and crashes into a coworker) (the coworker falls, taking a whole row of people down with them) (the pileup knocks someone into a power cable) (...a string of disasters like dominoes) (when the fifth disaster happens) The protagonist dusts himself off and stands up. An accident causes the entire company to lose power, and everyone who was about to be electrocuted is suddenly safe. Everyone: (heart pounding) (gasping as they realize they narrowly escaped death) Protagonist: Damn, I’m working really hard today too! Everyone: . Theme: Self-reliance and perseverance