Reverse-Order Bruce's Good Son

After kidnapping Bruce, kidnapping Batman, and even kidnapping himself, Fenrir was finally able to shout it out in the open.

"Being a Batman fan gets you nowhere. Being a twisted Batman fan is the true meaning of life!!"

"Batman, one day I’ll make you sincerely say, 'I hate you!'"

Then Bruce grabbed him by the ear and dragged him home.

:-D

Agh, damn it. He knew it. Kids have no rights.

Not as a person, not as a wolf, and not even as Bruce’s dog!!

*

The only upside was that Bruce took care of both him and Batman. During the day he could rest his head on Bruce’s lap, and at night he could hide behind Batman’s cape.

And everything he said before was total nonsense.

Twisted, what? If you can cuddle up and sleep with Batman, who needs to be mentally twisted?

He was clearly the healthiest, most energetic little boy in the world!

*

Bruce swore he hadn’t meant to adopt anyone. He meant to adopt a cute little dog. Then the dog turned into a wolf, the wolf turned into a person, and that person was someone who had recently turned the whole city upside down.

There was nothing for it. He swallowed the boomerang and, at twenty-four, gained a distant little nephew surrounded by rumors. (What kind of joke is this? He isn’t even married, so where would he get a kid?)

Fortunately, the boy was obedient. If told to go east, he never went west; if told to roll over, he never offered a paw. He never caused Bruce any worry about school, tutoring, socializing, or competitions, and even obediently followed the ban on night patrols.

*

Until Bruce really did have a biological son.

Until he and his biological son fought so fiercely that he could only find comfort by holding the little dog at night.

Until his biological son reached out with a devilish hand, taking Fenrir out overnight and teleporting him all over the multiverse.

Bruce fell into thought.

"Alfred, has Damian learned his lesson?"

"Sir, the young master and Fenrir have been missing for three days."

"What? How dare he?!"

"This is the last email the young master sent."

The old father looked up, trying to suppress his anger, and saw the words:

Old man, your kid’s mine now.

*

Phew...

Good thing it was a dream.

Bruce wiped the cold sweat from his forehead, clutched the edge of the blanket, and gazed out at the storm clouds and thunder, grateful for his beautiful life.

The doorbell rang. A black-haired, blue-eyed little boy appeared at the door. "Batman, the breakthrough in this case is..."

Bruce paused. "Wait, who are you?"

Tim blinked, uncertain. "Uh, the new Robin? Damian didn’t tell you?"

Bruce: "..."

No, what is this supposed to mean?

Highlights:

1. A silly, sweet little story with a lighthearted, everyday feel.

2. A little identity-play and cat-ification of Bats. He’s in his early twenties, the prime of his life.

Check out my new upcoming story, Bruce pairing: I’ll Find Your Dad and Beat You Up. Visit my author page for the completed story Jason’s Batdog, too!

After being punished in all sorts of ways by Nightwing, Red Hood, and Red Robin, Akala finally got angry and went after Robin’s dad instead.

I’ll take that! Batman!!

He changed identities and used all kinds of skills, ranging from Arkham’s top specialist to a third-rate street bum. He’d been burned, struck by lightning, and stuffed into a rolling suitcase and thrown into a bright green bathhouse.

But he never gave up.

A succubus only takes the best.

Batman, you’re the best.

You little birds, just you wait. I’ll get your dad to deal with you!!!

*

Then he found out that BatBruce was real.

Damn it, being the third person in a relationship isn’t the kind of thing a modern succubus should do!

Akala left in despair, then secretly started shipping them.

Until he realized that his friend, his former imaginary rival, the frail Gotham rich boy, and Bruce’s four sons were all so uniformly awful that just looking at them made his fists itch.

Damn it.

He cursed once: BatBruce really is real!

He cursed twice: those little birds are even worse than they look!

He cursed three times: damn this modern succubus thing. He’s a traditionalist now: he’s all in!

Bruce and Batman, I’ll take you both!!

You brats, get ready to go home and get beaten up by two dads. No, three dads now! Hahahaha!!!

Akala cackled.

*

Until he found out that Batman was like this with his little birds:

Batman, stern and solemn: "You can’t do that! Follow orders!!"

Nightwing: Haha

Red Hood: Heh

Red Robin: Zzz

Robin: Tt

The succubus trying to throw his weight around: ...

Well, good thing he didn’t put all his eggs in one basket.

Bruce, show up!!!

Show off your sweet daddy charm, melt them with your smile! Bewitch them with your voice! Control them! Take charge! Order them around!!

From this day onward, you’ll be the uncrowned king of Gotham!!

Can’t wait.

Jason clicked his tongue. "Old man, don’t smile like such a creep."

Bruce: "..."

Akala: Not happy.

Damn it, he failed again.

He shifted his gaze toward Alfred.

Bruce: ?

Theme: There are no bad parents in the world; the rarest thing in life is a brother.