[Western Crossover] He's a Blondie

[The first ongoing novel in the author’s column: How to Wake Up My Corrupted Old Man [DC]] Also known as: A Background Guy’s Log of Crawling Through Darkness Synopsis: He’s a random blond guy, and so am I. We’re both blond. Why can’t I be the one who hooks up with Red Robin? If you could transmigrate to the America of the past, what would you do? You might invest heavily in Apple stock, bet on every World Cup final, or visit Notre-Dame before 2019... things like that. Unless your spawn point is Gotham. All right, you’re born. You’re a blond man, not a woman, with both biological parents alive and no one in your family working in an illegal profession. And you’re born in Gotham. You’re just some random blond guy. Without black hair and blue eyes, your chances of becoming part of Gotham’s main cast plummet. But the increased odds of your parents surviving make up for that shortfall. No Apple, Google, or Tesla stocks to let you coast to victory means you’ve lost your shot at getting rich. Gotham’s survival battle royale only makes poverty more likely. Great. You can live a stable, peaceful life as an ordinary Gothamite. After your teacher turns into a Walmart shopping bag, your classmates storm a psychiatric hospital just to hang out with a friend, the mayor is over the moon, and the president’s imagination runs wild, you’re even more Gotham in the head. What’s wrong with being blond? Blonds can amount to something too! Gotham has people like the Clock King and the Mad Hatter, doesn’t it? Wait, is there even a blond man in the major villain lineup? Hmph! A blond guy can still come out as gay with Red Robin and make the fans lose their minds! ...A blond guy... a nobody... Huh? Why couldn’t it be you? Tom Rust*Tim Drake, blond top/vigilante bottom. Theme: Ordinary people can be their own heroes