Let Me Water the High-and-Mighty Flower

[Preorder: a goofy wuxia novel, “After Reading His Mind, I Found Out My Rival Had Bent Himself Into a Paper Clip,” Guo Nuanlv x Gao Youyou. If you like it, add it to your collection!] I have an enemy who’s an untouchable beauty. Every time I run into him, it’s like thunder crashing into fire. By thunder, I mean I hit him with such shocking words that he nearly keels over. By fire, I mean his bizarre logic makes me so angry I’m practically aflame. So whenever I meet this untouchable beauty, I want to water his head until he cries. That would be best. A modern shut-in transmigrates into the body of an ancient, expressionless assassin and is forced to assassinate a powerful martial-world big shot. After a series of ridiculous mishaps, he comes to a terrifying and cruel realization: if you want to date an untouchable beauty, you have to be even more untouchable than he is. Originally titled “I Tried to Assassinate the Big Shot Seven Times,” this is a goofy wuxia novel with plenty of snark. Click here to visit the author’s profile. Feel free to add it to your collection! The next wuxia novel is “After the Daddy-Type Turns Dark, He Turns the Tables on Me [Reverse Transmigration into a Book],” Liang Wan x Nie Xiaotang. Here’s the blurb: After transmigrating into the body of the evil organization’s boss’s younger brother, Nie Xiaotang decides he’ll never join them in their wicked ways. Years later, after years of doggedly slacking off, his brother finally kicks him out of the evil organization. That’s when a strange person shows up looking for him. “Hello, Host. I’m a dispatcher for the Transmigration Bureau System. You transmigrated into an ancient BL novel called ‘Tang the Great Hero Wrote a Thousand Danmei Stories.’ Your brother is a minor villain who’s going to die in a few years. If you want to save him and return to the modern world, kill the protagonist, Tang the Great Hero, and change the plot.” “...” Nie Xiaotang listens with an impassive expression, then says, “Do you know how long ago I transmigrated?” “No.” “More than twenty years ago! I’ve lived here so long I’m basically a native! Everyone else gets their transmigration System right at the beginning, but mine shows up more than twenty years late. Do you have some kind of grudge against me?” “Sorry, the System’s delay was an accidental bug. We weren’t singling you out. If you don’t want to return to the modern world, don’t you at least want to save your own brother? If you don’t take out the protagonist, he’ll take out your brother.” Nie Xiaotang: “Where’s the protagonist? I’ll go find him.” “Oh, so you’ve finally decided to kill the protagonist?” “No.” Nie Xiaotang sneers. “I’m going to find him and help him take out my useless brother sooner!” “...” “If you don’t want to kill the protagonist, you can change the plot in another way.” “How?” “You can make an important male supporting character turn evil.” Nie Xiaotang goes to investigate that supporting character, still unconvinced. When he comes back, he turns the idea down on the spot. “No way. I can’t do it.” “Why not?” “Couldn’t you check this supporting character’s personality before giving me the mission?” Nie Xiaotang roars. “He’s a kind, gentle, and utterly devoted daddy-type! There’s no way he could turn evil!” “...Huh? Are you sure?” Liang Wan x Nie Xiaotang. Transmigration into a book in the first half, reverse transmigration into a book in the second. A warm-hearted, cunning righteous daddy-type seme x a proud, short-tempered fake villain uke. Theme: Goofiness and passion never go out of style.