Forgive Me, I Was Young and Didn't Know Love

The most painful kind of clarity is living inside a lie you tell yourself.

Blurb:

I'll always remember that sunny day in eighth grade. He stepped in front of me, his tall frame blocking the sun above my head. I could feel the warmth of his teenage body. He cut in line in front of me, but I wasn't mad.

Later I learned that this boy, who was always called up to read out his self-criticism, was fiercely loyal. Even with blood from a fight on the corner of his mouth, he still remembered the little bear cake he'd promised me. With a scab on his lips, he smiled at me. "What are you looking at? Hide the cake before the hall monitor sees it."

One night in eleventh grade, I asked in a trembling voice, "I think... I might like someone. Can you help me pursue them?"

The crackle of him crushing his soda can sounded like a broken heart. "Tell me about them. I'll help you win them over."

Later, I said, "It's you."

He smiled and said, "Too late. Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

I took it as a gentle rejection. He didn't like me.

It was only years later, at a wedding banquet, when I saw the silver glint on his ring finger and the evasive look in his eyes, that I understood how heartfelt his "Too late" had been. I watched the person I loved marry someone else, from beginning to end.

After the wedding, I went to the school building where we first met. I wandered around in a daze before remembering I should go home. Just as I reached the school gate, an unfamiliar woman hugged me, crying. "Why have you come here again? He's already dead. Don't keep yourself trapped here. Mom will take you home..."

Only then did I remember a truth I couldn't accept, and that had made me the madwoman my relatives talked about.

He and I had loved each other long ago. He went all the way to Guangdong to earn the bride price, but the flight that was supposed to bring him home stayed forever in the sky at the start of 2024.

"But afterward, my memories kept getting stuck in the past, and even I altered them."

Reader's Guide:

1. First-person narration. Bad ending. The blurb contains some spoilers.

2. Neither the female nor male lead is perfect. Discussion is welcome, but don't insult the characters.

Coming Soon: Short Story Collection, "Sis, Are You Streaming Today?"

A sweet romance that begins with a misunderstanding.

Lin Shengwan: A graceful, gentle voice streamer whose audience is mostly students in their early twenties. In real life, she's socially anxious. She streams to make a few friends and soothe insomniacs with her voice. She's short on money but never begs for gifts.

When she unexpectedly receives a one-yuan gift, she says, "Thanks for the card-pulling money, little sis, but I'd rather hear about something that made you happy today~"

Lu Chenzhou: A CEO from a wealthy family. The word "trust" doesn't exist in his dictionary; he assumes anyone who approaches him has ulterior motives.

So, to investigate the "scammer streamer" his younger sister likes, he pretends to be a minor and enters Lin Shengwan's livestream. "I've tipped you 20,000 yuan for tuition. Big sis, I'll drop out and support you."

Lin Shengwan: Little brother, add me on WeChat. I'll pay you back after the platform settles my earnings next month.

Lu Chenzhou thinks, She's asking for my WeChat already. She really is a scammer. A month after adding her, he receives a 20,000-yuan transfer from Lin Shengwan, plus another 200 yuan.

Lin Shengwan: Use the 200 to buy exam prep books. Good luck on your college entrance exams, little brother!

Later, the assistant looks at his boss. "Mr. Lu, the merger..."

"Don't bother me." The man is wearing AirPods, while a pink comment drifts across the screen: "Big sis, your voice reading The Little Prince is so lovely~"

Assistant: ? Do you even remember why you came to watch the stream?

Half an hour later, Lu Chenzhou looks up, furious, and says coldly, "Look into the Fenla livestreaming platform. I want to acquire it."

The assistant glances down, unsure what happened. The livestream has been shut down.

The day Lu Chenzhou reveals he's rich, Lin Shengwan is startled. She's heard rich people are all perverts, so she worries he might harass her and deletes him from her WeChat friends. That night, she receives a one-million-yuan gift from Lu Chenzhou.

The operations manager angrily scolds her: "How could you delete your top donor from your friends? Keep him happy!"

She has no choice but to add him back. She decides to quit streaming after this month, but at the annual streamer awards, Lin Shengwan attends as a special guest and is cornered backstage.

The man blocking her is very tall. Lu Chenzhou says in a low, pleading voice, "Would you consider becoming Fenla's top female streamer? I'll make you famous, on the condition that you keep streaming. I can't sleep without your voice."

Then she learns that the man is the sixteen-year-old minor from her livestream.

Lin Shengwan: I guess not all rich people are perverts... some just pretend to be young and childish.

Both are each other's only partners. Five-year age gap. A healing, sweet romance. This story does not endorse minors giving gifts; the male lead is only pretending to be a minor!!!

Theme: Be brave and say "I love you"