I Cured Myself with Chinese Medicine

Wen Gen is a closeted homophobe. His life plan is to find an ordinary wife and have an ordinary child. Then, after accidentally coming across suggestive videos of muscular men online, he discovers that his sexuality isn’t ordinary after all. Could he really be a completely unordinary gay man?! Once he realizes he’s attracted to men, he posts online asking how to cure himself of homosexuality. A helpful netizen calling himself “AAA Heir to a Traditional Chinese Medicine Family” warmly suggests: “Try drinking some Chinese medicine to get your body back in balance.” = Wen Gen begins drinking Chinese medicine three times a day, morning, noon, and night. Halfway through the treatment, a new neighbor moves in across the hall. The new neighbor has long, curly hair, a face like a spring blossom, and lips as red as rosy clouds. Wen Gen hears his own heart pounding. Looks like the Chinese medicine treatment is working wonders. I’m cured! I’ve fallen in love with a woman at first sight! After years of being single, Wen Gen has only just gotten himself “back in balance,” so he doesn’t dare make a move. He can only ask the netizens for advice, and with their help, he pursues his new neighbor. The results are excellent. On his neighbor’s birthday, as he eats the cake Wen Gen brought him, he asks if Wen Gen wants to date him. Overcome with excitement, Wen Gen downs an entire bottle of red wine. The next morning, he wakes up to find his neighbor lying beside him. … He’s even older than Wen Gen. … And he’s the suggestive muscular man who made Wen Gen realize he wasn’t straight. = Wen Gen digs out the Chinese medicine that was gathering dust. In the morning, he brews a pot for himself and gives a bowl to the neighbor who’s come over for breakfast. Then he plays a greatest-hits collection of lines like “How homosexuality will ruin your life” at full volume on his phone. At noon, he drinks another bowl and reminds his neighbor, who’s at work, not to forget his medicine. He also forwards him a treatment plan for homosexuality. In the evening, he brews more medicine to a recording of an anti-gay lecture, then pinches his new neighbor’s nose and makes him drink a bowl. Late at night… The neighbor, reeking of medicine, climbs into his bed. The eight-pack abs under his loose robe nearly blind Wen Gen. In a low voice, he says, “Hubby, want to see if the treatment worked?” Wen Gen: “…” Maybe he should give it a try? A dazed, old-school, closeted straight-man bottom who’s a sucker for good looks vs. a beautiful, black-hearted, persistent top who can handle anything life throws at him and seduces his way through it I also want to write The Ordinary Guy and the Male Bodhisattva Switch Bodies. The blurb is below. Head over to my author page and bookmark it, mwah mwah! Cheng Siyuan has been sickly since childhood. To keep his parents from worrying, he’s always been well-behaved and obedient, like an NPC who only ever does the same handful of things. On the day he moves to a new neighborhood for work, a motorcycle pulls up beside his moving van. The man gets off and removes his helmet, then helps Cheng Siyuan carry in his computer tower. Looking at the man’s cool motorcycle and lean physique beneath his riding gear, Cheng Siyuan can’t help feeling envious. That night, he switches bodies with the neighbor who owns the cool motorcycle. = The neighbor is six foot two, with broad shoulders, a narrow waist, and a V-shaped torso, complete with pecs, abs, and a shark-line definition. After making a bet with a friend, he’s been posting suggestive videos online to gain followers and win the wager. Cheng Siyuan panics. “Let’s figure out how to switch back as soon as possible.” The neighbor hands him his phone. “No rush. Come on, let’s film today’s suggestive video first.” Cheng Siyuan: “…” He stiffly strikes a pose for the camera. The neighbor holds up the phone and coaches him. “Like this. Run your hand over yourself.” “It’s my body, so you don’t need to feel shy about touching it.” Cheng Siyuan grits his teeth and touches his biceps. … They feel really nice. His hand moves to the pecs, the abs, and then lower… The neighbor calls a halt. “Any lower and we can’t film it.” = It takes less than two days for Cheng Siyuan to go from panicking to loving it. He completely switches sides and becomes the most devoted fan of this body. Sure, filming suggestive videos every day with the neighbor in his own body is embarrassing. And having to stick so close to the neighbor to keep other people from noticing something is off can be awkward. Pretending to be in a relationship with the neighbor when his parents suddenly show up is also a lot. But now he can run and jump, punch a pickpocket who steals his phone halfway across the street, and touch wonderfully firm muscles without even having to work out! There’s no need to switch back to this body! So when they do switch back, he’s devastated. “I liked that body.” The neighbor kisses away his tears, takes his hand, and guides it back to his body. Biceps, pecs, abs, and lower. He coaxes him: “Want to try experiencing it another way?” A seemingly obedient and resistant, but secretly shameless and lecherous housewife bottom vs. an abstract-minded top who seems obsessed with suggestive videos but is actually obsessed with seducing his wife Theme: Don’t treat “ordinary” as an insult. Ordinary people can have lives full of ups and downs, too.