Please Spare Me, Emperor

Xu Yun was originally an earthly immortal, and an imperfect one at that. Her hearing was poor, and she could not speak. Among so many exceptional immortals, she seemed especially ordinary. Luckily, Xu Yun was willing to work hard. She practiced diligently and conscientiously for more than six hundred years, finally going from an ordinary immortal to an obscure junior celestial official. Who could have guessed that, on her first visit to the Four Brahma Heavens, she would catch the eye of a big shot who had long resided in the Thirty-Six Heavens, someone she had only ever seen in storybooks? The big shot wore a lazy smile, but her dark eyes held a trace of frost, and she came at Xu Yun brimming with murderous intent. Xu Yun instantly lost her wits, unsure whether the big shot had scared her senseless or whether simply seeing her had made her too excited. "Your Majesty, spare her!" An old immortal hurried up the long stone steps, waving his arms and shouting. "She is the one destined for you by the Mandate of Heaven! If you kill her, you won't survive either!" The famous sword Han Cang swept over Xu Yun's round head. The wind and clouds changed, and dust billowed everywhere. "Why didn't you say so earlier!" The big shot sheathed her sword and immediately changed her tune. "There was a fly on your head. I chased it away." The junior celestial official, who had nearly died and could not speak: "..." Lately, an untouchable, imperious figure has always been following the obscure junior celestial official around. The ghost clansmen who constantly harass the junior official flee at the sight of the Qiankun pouch hanging from the imperious figure's waist. A ferocious beast the junior official battled for days without subduing is reduced to ashes with a flick of the imperious figure's finger. Even the immortals who usually order the junior official around have become gracious and kind toward her. Everyone says she's struck it lucky and earned the Celestial Emperor's protection and favor. But Xu Yun, supposedly so lucky, is unable to eat or sleep. She lives in constant fear, worrying that one day she'll be sacrificed to a sword. The person beside her seems able to read her mind. She scratches Xu Yun under the chin. "You don't want to stay with me?" Before Xu Yun can nod, the woman pinches her earlobe. "Fate has played a cruel trick on us. Whether you like it or not, you'll have to put up with me. Once our fated bond is broken, I'll make sure you die a quick death." Xu Yun, whose poor hearing means it takes a while to understand what the woman said: "..." Whoever wants this kind of blessing can have it! But the woman who kept saying she would kill Xu Yun later solemnly carved her own name onto their marriage token, then stubbornly insisted that the speech-impaired junior official read it aloud to her. If she didn't, she would be "punished." "Repeat after me: Gu... Qian..." The woman traced the line of the junior official's waist, her lips enveloping the tip of her finger as she bit it from time to time. Xu Yun's voice trembled as she copied her. "Gu..." "Gu... Qian." The woman patiently repeated it. Xu Yun: "Qian... mmm..." Before she could finish, the curtains at their side swayed gently. The woman's soothing kiss landed beside the junior official's lips, her fingers twining with hers, enticing the innocent, confused junior official to sink into a sea of passion. At dawn, Xu Yun wrapped herself in the brocade quilt and gazed at the person beside her. She decided that perhaps this was a blessing worth accepting after all. Before long, their fated bond was undone, their destined connection vanished, and heaven and earth were torn asunder. The famous sword Han Cang swallowed clouds and eclipsed the moon, unstoppable, yet it enclosed Xu Yun within a barrier formed from sword energy. Outside the barrier, Gu Qian formed a hand seal in midair, risking her life without hesitation. Her beauty was peerless, like jade and gold. Inside the barrier, Xu Yun, who could not speak, opened her mouth and found the words flowing with startling ease. "Gu Qian, come back! Do you want to die?!" "Shh..." The woman pressed a finger to her lips, her eyes full of tenderness. "When I come back, you can say my name properly." ☆ An apparently sweet-tempered junior official who plays dumb while secretly being shrewd VS a haughty, domineering beauty who does whatever she feels like Reading guide: [1] The age gap spans generations. Both leads are each other's only partners. One-on-one romance, happy ending! Happy ending! Happy ending! [2] My take on xianxia, with tons of original worldbuilding. All the immortals live in the Thirty-Six Heavens. The story will explain which Thirty-Six Heavens these are. [3] This story's world has only one sex. (Don't ask. It's just the setting. Don't ask, it's only natural. It's xianxia, so I can do whatever I want~) [4] The junior official has poor hearing, but is not completely deaf. [5] My writing is amateurish. I hope everyone reads for fun. Feel free to discuss the plot and characters reasonably, but please don't attack anyone personally. Theme: Ordinary people can have their own brilliant lives.