A Detective Conan Selfcest Chronicle

Wushan Heqing is a struggling web-novel author. Ever since he was born, he's had a useless System with him that always displays: "Requirements unmet. This System is still locked."

Then one day, someone steals his phone and wallet. Heartbroken, he sits by a flower bed, wallowing in misery. His vision suddenly blurs, and the scenery around him changes in subtle ways. For example, two trash cans have suddenly appeared by the roadside.

Still wallowing in misery, he scratches a few words into the dirt with a twig: "Kind person, please lend me enough money to get home."

Twenty-two-year-old Wushan Heqing crouches by the roadside. His light brown hair is tied into a small braid, and his amber eyes are full of pitiful helplessness. He looks like a little cat trying to beg for a can of fish.

A kind high school girl passing by lends him some money for the trip home. The very next second, the System that had been dead for over twenty years finally comes to life: "Host has met the requirements for begging on the street. Congratulations, you've unlocked the Housekeeping System, your loyal partner!"

Wushan Heqing: "???"

He ignores the damn Housekeeping System that's been dead for over twenty years and uses the kind high school girl's money to get home. He struggles to fit his key into the lock, only for a burly man with tattooed arms to come out, looking furious. "Hey! Are you trying to break into my home?!"

Wushan Heqing: "???" Wait, isn't this my home?!

After the System unlocks, he's left without a registered identity.

"Host's predicament detected. Newbie gift pack: A high school boy with maxed-out cheerful, kind, and lucky buffs, a future housekeeper on standby. Would you like him deployed?"

With nothing left to lose, Wushan Heqing selects "Yes."

"The high school boy finds a winning lottery ticket by the roadside. Taking pity on the Host's miserable predicament, he gives him the ticket. At his parents' request, the high school boy has gone home to prepare for his entrance exams. He hopes the Host will live well."

Wushan Heqing: "!!!"

Scene One:

"Ten-pull gift pack: Housekeeper unlocked. An aunt surnamed Fu who spends her whole life chasing idols gives the Host a proper identity out of motherly kindness."

"Buy one, get one free. Aunt Fu also gives the Host the house-rental service for a property owned by the head housekeeper, as a friendly gesture."

Wushan Heqing says solemnly, "Who is Aunt Fu? I'll make a longevity tablet for her."

System: "Good people don't want their identities revealed when they do good deeds. Aunt Fu starts as Aunt Fu, and will always be Aunt Fu."

Every housekeeper drawn from the System has a distinct personality, but Wushan Heqing is always most grateful to the thoughtful Aunt Fu, and of course, the unnamed high school student.

Because:

"To unlock the next housekeeper, the Host must meet the unlock requirement: begging."

Scene Two:

"Notice: Several rats have been spotted near your residence. Housekeeper Qin has eliminated the infestation for you."

In the distance, Vodka is furious: "Boss! Vermouth dared spread rumors that you cross-dressed! She even photoshopped a picture and sent it to everyone!"

Gin's forehead veins bulge.

Scene Three:

"Housekeeper An casually rolls the dice and gives you a laid-back bookstore, where you can enjoy smooth, uninterrupted writing sessions."

"A case has taken place in your bookstore. Future housekeeper girl Little Ke springs into action after hearing about it, and sends the criminal to prison!"

"Housekeeper girl Little Ke finds the meaning of life and decides to quit housekeeping and become a detective. She goes to school to study hard and urges the Host to live well."

Conan stares at the little girl solving the case, his pupils trembling with shock.

Less than a month after opening the bookstore, a mysterious man wearing a mask arrives. He scans Wushan Heqing from head to toe with a cold, penetrating gaze.

He curls his lips into a playful smile, but his voice is so pleasant that Wushan Heqing's ears twitch. "Nice to meet you. I'm Baiye Xueqing."

The catlike Heqing is wary, but the detestable man coaxes him into letting down his guard. Little Heqing gradually comes to think Mr. Baiye has the charm of a mature adult, and admires and yearns for him.

Little Heqing stares at Mr. Baiye's abs, then looks at his own perfectly intact abs, and feels his whole world collapse.

Xueqing: Snow looks clean and pure on the surface, but is actually the dirtiest thing of all.

#Doppelgangers, delusions of grandeur

#Dream-filled, ambitious, wary cat uke x worldly, shrewd, liquor-distillery-boss seme

#Wushan Heqing x Baiye Xueqing, one from the past, one from the future

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