Nuo

The beginning and the following may be too confusing, the main line is not obvious, and there are too many titles. Not parents, grandparents? The word "crazy criticism" can be used more than ten times in one chapter, and it's still "crazy criticism" or "crazy criticism". Who knows how many there are. If the roll is not neat and tidy, it will get zero points.

There are more than 20 chapters in the worldview. The worldview has not advanced at all. Except for the protagonist, other areas are covered. It is difficult to substitute the modern background and make it impossible to follow. A bunch of girls like it too much. How talented the author is, how could he write such a plot.

It has three golden chapters at the beginning, and the first ten chapters have the feeling of Bo Yuntian, which can be substituted into the plot of the story and is a bit tear-jerking. It's just that the girl in the back chases the male protagonist desperately, and the two women are jealous of the male protagonist. Brother, this is not an urban novel or a rich novel, right? The protagonist is rich from the beginning, and the girl who chases the male protagonist is also rich as hell (the daughter of a big business owner) How can you give readers a sense of involvement? I didn't find the starting point. The protagonist of the story basically came from a poor background, was deceived, and needs to stay dormant. It's best not to have emotional scenes so soon. Fight and fight monsters first, because it won't be easy at the beginning anyway, so you can have a sense of substitution and reverse the plot. You started out as the son of a rich man, is there any story you can write? Cultivation? Summary: The protagonist is a vacation player, and does not need to endure hardships to make progress. He is given free money and beauty at the beginning. If you want to read this kind of story line, you can read it. Compared with the mysterious recovery or other supernatural novels, the emotional aspect is handled extremely poorly (the emotional line of the mysterious recovery is already invincible, this book is like a female channel)

Over fifty chapters, not counting relatives, six women showed up, and there were only three supernatural incidents. How did they end up in the supernatural area?

It's too messy, and I haven't clarified the main line, or after looking at it, I think it may be about mystery or fantasy or folklore. If you write about history or simple stories, then it's okay to write like that at the beginning, but the amount of information at the beginning is too large, and it doesn't involve fantasy, occultism, metaphysics, etc.

Recruit some supporting actors, don't be too exaggerated. It's really not okay to be all over the place. It will affect the plot. If you have a story, you can write it down. After reading it, Straw thinks it's good, so you can consider writing it in...

"When people are in trouble, they do Nuo; when Nuo dances begin, all diseases disappear."

The writing is very good, but there are some poisonous points. Maybe the author has never been chased by a girl. The things you write are usually things that boys can do. The story is very good, but if you can't update it, I won't have much desire to read it.

Damn, this novel is really bad. There is almost no advancement in setting and main plot. It takes thousands of words to compete for two women to compete for a male protagonist. It is several times worse than Samsara Paradise.

Come on, why did you suddenly change from history to supernatural? I have read your book Bei Song before (although I haven't finished it yet)