How to Properly Tame a Mad Dog

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This story: Size difference | Height difference | Devoted, loyal top who comes around x flirtatious beauty bottom | A short story of over 100,000 characters | The full story costs only 1.4 yuan to subscribe to | The author's first historical danmei, written as practice

Blurb:

Years ago, Shen Jingyu, the only son of the Shen family of Gusu, found a man by the river.

Seeing that he was strong and handsome, Shen Jingyu decided to keep him around.

He figured the man would make a decent diversion when he was bored.

Who could have guessed the man would be so proud and unruly? He claimed to be from the imperial capital and swore Shen Jingyu would pay for offending him.

Shen Jingyu ignored him, thinking that without me, your sorry life might already be over. So he kept right on offending him.

Later, after Pei Zhi had recovered, he didn't make Shen Jingyu pay. Instead, he knelt at his feet and asked reverently, "What do you want?"

Shen Jingyu joked, "Didn't you say you were from the imperial capital? Then I want to be the Commander of the Embroidered Uniform Guard."

He'd only said it to make things difficult for him.

But when he woke up the next morning, an imperial edict had arrived, ordering him to take up the post at the Embroidered Uniform Guard that very day.

Shen Jingyu: ? Oh no, this guy really is from the imperial capital.

-

As the first person in history to become Commander of the Embroidered Uniform Guard without ever lifting a finger, and with no martial arts skills whatsoever, Shen Jingyu was quite troubled.

It wasn't that he refused to resign. Pei Zhi simply wouldn't let him "retire to his hometown." Whenever Shen Jingyu said he wanted to return to Gusu, Pei Zhi would immediately cry hard enough to shatter the palace tiles.

Shen Jingyu thought he might as well wait for the ministers to submit memorials impeaching him. Surely Pei Zhi couldn't handle that much pressure?

But no matter how long he waited, not a single impeachment came.

What he didn't know was that whenever a minister submitted a memorial against Shen Jingyu during the day, a mysterious person would make a terrible ruckus at the minister's home that night. No blood was shed, but everyone was left in a state of panic.

They all assumed Shen Jingyu had raised himself a very good dog.

-

Later, the ministers began wondering just who Shen Jingyu's dog really was.

No one had ever seen his true face.

Everyone speculated, until someone suddenly said, "But aren't our memorials supposed to be confidential, submitted directly to His Majesty?"

Everyone: !!!

Watch your words! Watch your words!!!

-

Little bonus scene:

Pei Zhi realized early on that he couldn't afford to have even the slightest disagreement with Shen Jingyu, because whenever they argued, cats and dogs, men and women, young and old would all flock to Shen Jingyu's side.

The ministers realized early on that after His Majesty and Shen Jingyu argued, they absolutely mustn't go talk to Shen Jingyu. Otherwise, their homes would be turned upside down that very night.

A few little notes:

1. One-on-one pairing, happy ending, both are each other's first and only. Flirtatious beauty bottom x devoted dog (mad dog) top.

2. The "homes turned upside down" part is literal, but not a single innocent chicken or puppy is harmed in this story. (Bows.)

3. An indulgent story written purely to satisfy the author's tastes: height difference, size difference, strength difference, younger top, all included.

4. An alternate history with lots of original worldbuilding. Please ignore the many plot holes in the blurb. It's a comedy, and everything serves the author's tastes. The plan is to finish at 100,000 characters, but I might write more if I get carried away.

5. The story is split between everyday life in Gusu and court life, but there isn't a lot of political intrigue. It mostly focuses on daily life.

Theme: Of all the words in the world, "love" is the hardest to write.