Do All Your Crown Princes Pick Up Wives Wherever They Go?

[I'm not very good at writing medium-length historical danmei, QAQ]

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A slow-witted, sweet, pitiful bottom x a controlling, maximally restrained top

Content warning: [Pseudo-incest]

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Xie Yulan was born with dulled senses and stammered when he spoke. Although he was a prince, his mother consort had been sent to the Cold Palace, so he naturally received no favor.

When Xie Yulan was ten, the eldest prince, Xie Linyuan, took him in and raised him.

Xie Linyuan was gentle and refined, and treated Xie Yulan extremely well. He almost wanted to hold him in the palm of his hand.

And so Xie Yulan spent nine years wanting for nothing.

All the palace maids and eunuchs knew that the eldest prince, Xie Linyuan, doted especially on that little fool with the stutter.

Whenever the eldest prince went out of the palace, he always brought sweet cakes back for the little stutterer.

Each time, Xie Yulan would run into the eldest prince's arms and hold a bite of sweet cake to Xie Linyuan's lips, saying without a trace of propriety, "E-Elder Brother... you... you have some too."

The maids were always alarmed for Xie Yulan when they saw the look in the eldest prince's eyes, as if he wanted to devour him.

But Xie Yulan never noticed a thing.

*

That was until upheaval struck the palace, and Xie Yulan was exposed as an impostor, a civet cat that had taken the place of the royal heir. He was not the emperor's child at all.

Looking at the true prince standing before him, the one who should have had his life,

Even someone as slow-witted as Xie Yulan knew he ought to pack up and leave.

But the only person he couldn't bear to part with was Xie Linyuan.

So he packed all the things Xie Linyuan had given him over the past nine years into a little bundle, hugged it close, and left the palace where he had lived for nineteen years.

*

Xie Yulan returned to the home where he had originally been born, only to learn that his birth parents had died young and he was the only one left in the family.

Xie Yulan, who had been pampered since the age of ten, had long forgotten what hardship felt like.

But to survive, he found himself a job.

Then one evening, after a tiring day, Xie Yulan returned home and saw Xie Linyuan sitting beside the bed in his bedroom.

The little knickknacks Xie Yulan had brought with him were neatly arranged beside the man. Hearing Xie Yulan come back, Xie Linyuan turned his head and called softly, "Come here."

The moment Xie Yulan saw Xie Linyuan, he was overwhelmed with grievance. As soon as he walked over, the man pulled him into his arms.

Before Xie Yulan could even tell him how much he had missed him, an arm locked around his lower back, and his elder brother was no longer as gentle and doting as before. "If you love your elder brother so much, why did you leave?"

The possessiveness buried deep in Xie Linyuan's bones erupted completely the moment he saw Xie Yulan.

"Come back to the prince's residence with your elder brother. I'll take care of you for the rest of your life. Wouldn't that be nice?"

#Emperor, your son is gay!!!!!

Come have a taste of an older top who's restrained and self-controlled, and a younger bottom who's innocent and unknowingly provocative, QAQ

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Reader's guide:

1. The language leans colloquial and isn't purely classical. The setting and dynasty are fictional. Pure sweetness, no angst, so feel free to dive in, OvO.

2. I wanted an older top and pseudo-incest, so I wrote this indulgent piece for myself. It's meant to help you relax. I didn't think too hard while writing, so read carefully if you want to think hard while reading.

3. The bottom's stutter will improve. His slow reactions and dullness will also get better later on, until he's more or less like an ordinary person. He's not truly stupid.

Who Taught My Roommate to Draw BL Comics?!

Blurb:

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Le Chu graduated from one of the country's top art academies. After graduating, he turned down many job offers and chose to become a danmei comic artist.

In public, he was a cheerful, sunny young man. In private, he liked indulging himself by drawing all kinds of silly little comics.

Recently, he moved to find inspiration for a new comic, only for his home to flood one day after he moved in.

What rotten luck.

Le Chu went to ask the landlord if there were any other places available.

After hearing him out, the landlord said, "You could ask your neighbor whether he can rent you a room."

With no other choice, Le Chu went to knock on his neighbor's door.

The next second, it opened to reveal a cool guy wearing headphones, his hair a complete mess.

He swallowed and asked cautiously, "Could you rent me a bedroom? I promise I'll only use the bedroom and bathroom!"

Only later did Le Chu learn that the landlord meant for Lu Jing'an to rent him the entire apartment.

Because the whole residential complex belonged to Lu Jing'an's family.

*

His live-in roommate is very cute.

Apart from the fact that he keeps staring at him, Lu Jing'an thinks there's nothing wrong with him. At least, he hasn't affected his gaming livestreams.

Until one day, he discovers that his roommate, who told him he drew horror comics, actually draws BL comics...

As luck would have it, Le Chu comes back right then and catches him.

Lu Jing'an demands, "The horror comics you mentioned are BL comics?"

Le Chu retorts without the slightest shame, "Don't you think two guys getting together is horrifying?"

Lu Jing'an falls silent.

So why doesn't he find it horrifying? In fact, he's even a little excited.

*

Lulu's fans have recently been very happy with how often their favorite streamer goes live every day.

But one day, they suddenly hear a conversation through the microphone.

"You drew the top and bottom kissing wrong."

"Tell me what's wrong with it."

There's a bang as a stool gets kicked over.

"Come on, tell me!"

Then they hear their favorite streamer speak in a teasing tone he never uses in ordinary life: "Why don't you kiss me in the pose you imagined, with the bottom sitting on the top's abs and licking between his lips? Then you'll know, won't you?"

Can a Kitty Become the Dragon Queen?

Blurb:

A proud, easygoing little cat bottom x a cunning, noble black dragon top

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Yan Qiu is the first cat in the feline world to be on the verge of transforming into a human.

To prepare for his transformation, Yan Qiu specifically found a place with excellent feng shui.

But just as he was lying flat, waiting to become human, a huge black dragon carried him off.

Yan Qiu could neither call for help nor do anything else, so he could only sink his teeth into the black dragon's hard scales. "Meow meow meow!"

Unfortunately, the black dragon was no noble cat and couldn't understand cat language. Yan Qiu could only be carried into the Dragon Palace in despair.

*

Jinshe was the first black dragon under heaven. On his five-hundredth birthday, he decided to reward himself by looking for a pet in his own territory.

By chance, he found a cute calico cat.

When he saw the cat, it was lying on its back, basking lazily in the sun, its belly exposed and its mouth meowing without pause. Jinshe's heart stirred, and he carried the cat away.

But his cat seemed to have some sort of cat illness. It wouldn't eat raw fish or raw meat, and it also liked to meow at him.

It even liked standing on his shoulder to read storybooks, making a purring sound when it came to an exciting part.

*

On the day Yan Qiu transformed, Jinshe happened to be away.

Feeling terribly wronged, he could only bite Jinshe's clothes as he endured the pain of becoming human.

Even the tail he loved to flick was drooping.

Meanwhile, Jinshe was out looking for new storybooks for his calico. Suddenly feeling uneasy, he worried that his little pet had fallen ill and flew back to the Dragon Palace as fast as he could.

He hurriedly pushed open the palace doors and saw a handsome young man lying naked on his bed.

The young man was still holding in his mouth the clothes Jinshe had taken off just yesterday. His eyes were red and filled with tears, and the tail behind him, so familiar to Jinshe, was standing on end.

The first thing Yan Qiu said when he saw Jinshe was, "Jinshe! You're an irresponsible, awful dragon!"

The bad dragon was completely baffled.

Because his little cat had turned into a beautiful little sprite.

Theme: There will always be someone in the world who loves you