From the Start, I Spoiled the Xuanwu Gate Coup to Li Shimin [Historical Livestream]

I’ve opened a new novel for advance reservations. Please add it to your favorites, lovely readers! "After the Emperor Read My Inner Thoughts Journal" I originally planned to set it in the Ming dynasty, but that felt a little too satirical, so I decided to use a fictional dynasty instead. Here’s the blurb: After signing a shady contract with a damnable System, Mu Qi is sent back to ancient times. The good news is that the System has prepared him a body as the heir of a duke in the current dynasty. He’s born into wealth and privilege, right at the pinnacle of a fictional empire. The bad news is that the emperor is obsessed with alchemy, the upright officials and the corrupt officials are at each other’s throats, and with a foolish ruler above and greedy officials below, the nation is in decline. The dynasty won’t last much longer. The even worse news is that, according to the contract drafted by that damnable System, Mu Qi has to make a name for himself in this era, save the empire from ruin, prop up its collapsing foundations, and earn a place in the history books for all eternity. Otherwise, he’ll never be able to return. Faced with the little task his boss has assigned him, Mu Qi, who’s only any good at running his mouth, finally loses it: ...Just let the whole world burn already. After resisting over and over to no avail, Mu Qi gives up completely. He refuses to cooperate with the System and instead fills his submitted work journals with nonstop trash talk: [Another day of banging my head on the palace floor. I’m so done. That old lamp’s been making pills for years, so why hasn’t he kicked the bucket and dropped some loot yet?] [Court starts at five in the morning? Damn, what a miserable day. And Elder Xu of the Upright Faction, how do you have the nerve to accuse your political enemies of seizing farmland? Did the tens of thousands of acres of irrigated fields back home just fall from the sky? Disgusting.] [Damn it, I trashed the Upright Faction yesterday, so today I have to slap the Corrupt Faction in the face! A whole year inspecting the salt trade, and you only brought back a million taels of silver? The old Daoist has just alchemized his brain into mush. Otherwise, you’d better follow the ancestors’ example and skin him alive a few hundred times!] [I heard that old lamp of an emperor has spent decades abstaining from women. Wonder if it’s true? Come to think of it, no wonder fanfiction writers pair him up with his milk brother...] Every night, Mu Qi lets loose with a satisfying tirade, dumps all his trash onto the System, then goes straight to bed, not caring about a thing. There’s just one thing Mu Qi seems to have forgotten: his damnable System has never been able to guarantee the privacy of his information... · The emperor devotes himself to the arts of alchemy and magic, secluded in a secret chamber. After many days of spiritual cultivation, he finally moves Heaven itself. One day, the chamber blazes with light, and a booklet drops from midair. Four large characters are written on it: “Work Journal.” The emperor treasures it as if it were a priceless gift. After bathing and burning incense, he respectfully opens it and carefully reads Heaven’s revelation: [Evening of the eleventh day of the sixth month. As usual, today’s question: I’ve swallowed so many heavy metals, so how is that old lamp on the dragon throne still alive?] The emperor’s smile freezes. · On the twelfth day of the sixth month, a sudden upheaval rocks the palace. It is said that on that day, the emperor expelled every Daoist priest from the palace, severely punished the salt inspectors, confiscated all their property, and had them flayed and stuffed as a warning to future generations. That day, Mu Qi is lying flat at home, bored out of his mind, when he suddenly hears a notification he hasn’t heard in ages: “Huh? Why’s the mission progress bar moving on its own?” · This novel is also known as "Can Lying Flat and Keeping a Journal Make the Country Strong?" The setting is fictional. [The livestream’s influence takes place in a parallel space, with no interference between worlds] [80% anti-piracy threshold] Lin Shan has built up a little fame through popular history explainers. Taking advantage of the livestream boom in recent years, he accepts an invitation from a streaming site and becomes an amateur history content creator, posting several explanatory videos. History is usually a fairly niche subject, but his videos get an unexpectedly enthusiastic response. A few die-hard fans diligently like, comment, and share every episode, often messaging him privately and sending gifts. The discussions are always lively. With such devoted support from his fans, Lin Shan is naturally deeply touched. But maybe they’re getting a little too immersed in his videos, because their usernames and choice of words are all rather strange [What’s the one essential step to building an empire that will last for millennia?] by Li Shimin [How should the succession issue be resolved after a woman becomes emperor?] by Wu Zhao [Hu Hai is only ten years old right now. Could killing him save the Qin dynasty from its crisis?] by Ying Zheng Looking at his overflowing inbox, Lin Shan falls into deep thought once again. · · On the fourth day of the sixth month in the ninth year of the Wude era, Li Jiancheng and Li Yuanji receive an imperial summons to Linhu Hall, where they meet Qin Prince Li Shimin. Though each brother has his own agenda, they still exchange formal greetings, keeping up a façade of cordiality. While they’re making small talk, a beam of light suddenly flashes above the palace, enveloping all four men. Characters flicker across the light screen, accompanied by a loud, spirited voice, full of mockery: [“Dear viewers, today we’re moving on to the second installment in our Tang dynasty series, the long-awaited Xuanwu Gate Incident: the story of how His Majesty Li Er killed his elder brother and younger brother for fun...”] Li Shimin’s right hand slackens, and the bow he’s been hiding behind his back drops to the floor with a clatter. · In the third year of the First Emperor’s reign, the First Emperor makes a pilgrimage to Mount Tai to offer sacrifices to Heaven. On the way, a sudden downpour forces him to take shelter beneath a great pine tree. But before the rain can fall, the sky suddenly lights up with brilliant colors, driving away every last cloud. At the sight of this strange phenomenon, the accompanying officials fall to their knees, praising the emperor’s virtue for moving Heaven to bestow an auspicious sign. The First Emperor is thoroughly pleased with himself. He steps out from beneath the tree, looks up at the sky, and sees black characters drifting out of the rainbow light: [Three Years of Squandering, Five Years to Ruin: A Brief Guide to the Qin Dynasty’s Speedrun to Collapse Under Qin Er Shi, Hu Hai] · In the first year of the Guangzhai era, Empress Wu bestows favors upon her relatives, making her eldest nephew Wu Chengsi the Prince of Wei and appointing him Minister of Rites and Tong Zhongshu Menxia Sanpin. Wu Chengsi’s power and prestige are unmatched. In the sixth month of that year, Chengsi enters the palace to thank her for the honor. Empress Wu holds a banquet at Xiangju Hall, and ruler and ministers enjoy a warm, harmonious evening together. After three rounds of drinks, Wu Chengsi raises his cup and steps forward to praise Empress Wu’s achievements. Before he can begin, a light screen appears in midair, displaying an enormous title: [Auntie’s Words Are Lies: On the Struggle for Succession in the Middle of the Wu Zhou Era] · After making more than a dozen videos, Lin Shan finally begins to realize something is off. His die-hard fans, who seem so immersed in his videos, are acting a little too convincingly... Theme: Respecting history is the only way to respect the present.