The Top-Tier Boy Band Is Entirely Nonhuman

[Please add one of Xiaoshi’s upcoming novels to your reading list. Any one is fine!]

Question: Are the public personas of entertainment industry celebrities real?

Answer: I can’t speak for everyone, but every member of zero is definitely the real deal :)

Wandu, zero’s leader and the interstellar central AI, somehow ended up making an official debut alongside several nonhuman teammates.

His blond teammate is an unreliable Demon King who often runs out of energy and reverts to his original form.

His everyday routine is to find people in the comments to make wishes for, build up energy, and pester Wandu to promote him.

His black-haired teammate is a socially anxious Cthulhu-style evil god. Ordinary fans overlook him, but criminals take him seriously.

His everyday routine is to get invited to help the police solve cases and pester Wandu to speak for him.

His red-haired teammate is a sharp-tongued Dragon God. Skip the superstitions and he gets struck by lightning; believe in them and something goes wrong.

His everyday routine is to pick people in the comments to read their fortunes and pester Wandu to unseal him.

His blue-haired teammate… is Blue Star itself. He seems harmless, but whenever trouble breaks out, Blue Star is behind it.

His everyday routine is to come crying to Wandu that he’s been dirtied again and pester him to figure something out.

Wandu is a dependable leader. He thinks he’s the most reliable one in the group, and the one with the biggest headache. Being the dad of the group isn’t easy.

But their manager, Xiao Li, disagrees.

What a joke. Wandu’s dependability is like Schrödinger’s cat, okay?

Who else would get so worked up that he argues with people in the comments every day? And actually wins!

Later, Xiao Li, who has become the manager of a top-tier star boy band, accidentally stumbles across secrets he was never meant to know.

It seems there isn’t a single human being in their top-tier group :)

His leader, whose dependability is like Schrödinger’s cat, stares at him with emotionless eyes, looking conflicted.

“So… are we still putting on an act?”

Xiao Li: “…?”

The hand holding his cigarette trembles.

You absolute menaces, fine, you’re all my menaces!

Please take your secrets to the grave!

Little bonus scene:

Longtime zero fans warn every new fan:

1. Don’t go explain things or pick arguments under Xiao Bai’s comments. People will start questioning your intelligence.

2. Don’t casually make wishes under Xiao Huang’s comments. They may backfire.

3. Don’t profess your love under Xiao Hei’s comments. You might be mistaken for an insider.

4. Don’t eagerly ask Xiao Hong to read your fortune. His readings always spell trouble.

5. Don’t worry about Xiao Lan… do whatever you like. He’s the safest one.

A new fan doesn’t believe them, tries it out, and comes back…

New fan, timidly: “Rules for surviving the supernatural, got any more?”

Old fan, adding on casually: “6. No matter who you stan, say you’re a group fan when you go out. If you really don’t want to, say you’re a Lan fan. That’s safe.”

New fan: “…6”

Tips:

1. Ensemble-focused and variety-show-oriented, but that doesn’t mean they don’t act or release songs.

2. A silly, fun story, not an idol survival show. No pairings among the cast. Everyone gets equal treatment: teammates, fans, and Xiao Li alike.

3. Many variety-show segments are livestreamed, and livestreams have lots of comments. If you don’t like comment sections, read with caution.

Theme: Be a happy person, spread happiness to others, and become a role model who inspires everyone to move forward. That’s the power of an idol!