I'm Not Obligated to Ship the Same Person with Someone Else

Three years after debuting, the group X is still a complete flop.

They've had viral hits and iconic memes, and their members even come up in discussions about good looks on certain platforms.

And yet they're still flops.

After spending half a month undercover in a certain online community, the company boss issued an order: all members must fanservice each other.

Every three months, the members would be evaluated. The rankings would determine who they'd be paired with for fanservice over the next three months.

He was sure he'd figured out the secret.

A boy band had to sell more fanservice, and sell it hard.

Seeing the huge buzz they'd generated in such a short time, the boss nodded with satisfaction. He knew this would work.

-

The topic "When will X1 change husbands?" flooded the forums, until the moderators pinned a highlighted post and restricted all related discussion to that thread.

-When will Li Yu change husbands?

-The top-ranked member should retire already. Why not try pairing your money-losing second member with someone else for once?

-X2 is something else. Most idols eventually struggle to develop a romantic persona, but he goes and unlocks a homophobic persona in his old age. Shipping him with 21 is all I've got left in life. Every time I see that deadpan face of yours, it feels like you're mourning me. These past few days have been so miserable I wish I were dead, you second-rate loser.

-X really is something. They've been around for years and now they're acting out Boy Band Studies? Can't they go back to being all lovey-dovey and getting along like before?

-It's okay, everyone's suffering. Nobody's secretly happy.

-I know that look Third has been making in the recent behind-the-scenes clips. It's the look of a husband waking up from a sound sleep.

-Ha. I don't even want to talk about Fifth, the guy who treats the enemy as his father. Are there any normal people in your group?

-Watching the clips gives me the impression that a cabbage has grown sentience and learned to mount a pig. I'm in so much pain, so devastated, so hopeless.

-Am I the only one who thinks One keeps initiating and laying it on thick, while Two keeps up that cold, indifferent act? Doesn't it look like they're avoiding suspicion?

-...Yes, you're the only one.

-My friend! I wish I could live a life as sweet, sensible, and understanding as yours!

-

After spending three months forced into fanservice with the second-ranked member in the group's evaluation, Li Yu decides to switch partners.

He tries pairing up with his teammates one by one, and before long the old post is highlighted again.

-I get it now. So this is the time-honored fanservice strategy of building them up by first tearing them down.

A straight guy who'll do anything to get famous x his teammate

P.S. There are lots of fans who fantasize about the pursued character.

Considering several possible pursuers:

The stubborn second member, who doesn't put on a show and loses his wife in the process.

The third member, who wants to sell the pairing but gets turned into family because they're childhood friends.

The fourth member, who returns from studying abroad and takes the lead early because all that fanservice makes them feel like strangers.

The fifth member, a huge hit who gets portrayed as the group's son.

Listed by popularity, not age.

Theme: Study hard