Warriors Die When They Charge

Don't write about such legendary events in the early stage. It feels like it's not something that the protagonist can cope with at this stage. Writing it once in a while feels good and has an epic feel, but when you write it continuously, it changes. This is not the protagonist's journey of growth but a puppet dancing on the line for people's entertainment.

At the beginning, I wrote that the protagonist is a strong man, and then I wrote that he only weighs more than 100 kilograms. Later, I wrote that the orc is half a head taller and stronger than the protagonist, but only 95kg. You know, when I lost weight at 188, I was 96kg. If you don't know how to calculate weight, just use Jackie Chan as a template. Jackie Chan weighed 155 pounds and 173 pounds at his peak. If you write a strong man character who is taller than Jackie Chan, just multiply it. For example, if you write a 190-cm strong man with a body shape similar to Jackie Chan, the height will be 173×1.1 And the weight will be 155×1. 1×1.1×1.1 Is 206 pounds and 103kg, and then add or subtract it according to the body type and body fat rate. The weight you write now is too difficult to stretch. And if you watch basketball, Flash Wade is also a good example. He is 193cm tall and weighed 101kg at his peak.

I feel there is a problem. The protagonist is said to be a time traveler, but he behaves a bit like an indigenous person.

At the beginning, the scene where the protagonist suddenly appeared to play cards with the mage was really inexplicable. The cloak of intelligence fell to the ground despite trying to be funny. The author gave an explanation, but in my opinion, the character image was insufficiently developed and too abrupt. It would be much better to move these two plots to the back, or add a branch line in front to shape the protagonist's gambling character. The second dungeon was much better after entering the second stage. Writing group portraits of villains on the streets is not popular in serialized novels, but I read it in one go and it felt great. The recent Western Fantasy novel is a very good one, but it has a bad start. I don't know how many readers can endure it.

It was okay in the early stage. Even the gambling with the female mage that was criticized in the comment section was not that poisonous. After all, it may have a spell effect. But after that classic half-elf beauty appeared, I really couldn't hold myself any longer. I originally looked for dwarves as teammates at the beginning, and I also said that we finally have hardcore adventurers. I am fed up with 2B emotional dramas in which a naturally stupid and ignorant beauty is gradually influenced by the protagonist (who is also a drow, can you believe it)? I wrote several chapters in a row. Can't you just write an adventure and make a dungeon!

It looked very uncomfortable. The first few chapters felt baffling, and the later ones also felt baffling. The author managed to persuade me to quit within a dozen chapters.

The protagonist bets on dogs, and the opening lottery does not count. Chapter 10 is really speechless when he bets with the mage. There is also a problem with IQ. Don't want to read it

You're so stupid, are you sure you don't want to use the aboriginal settings?

To be honest, the character of the protagonist is quite fun to write. This book is definitely a good book, but the author likes to write group portraits. Is this a common problem among some high-level authors? Each character takes a lot of pen and ink to write. If you write too much, it will easily reduce the protagonist's sense of existence, and the plot will also slow down. It is easy to be criticized. There are many excellent new books, but there are too few that can be completed. I hope this one will not run away because of poor results.

Next time the perspective changes, let's make a transition. The transitions are abrupt and hard to read.