The Self-Cultivation of a Master

The sense of fragmentation is too strong. The character of the protagonist is too disconnected from the plot. When you write a fairy tale, the atmosphere is well-done and the description of the environment is also quite good. But your plot has a strong sense of fragmentation. One second your protagonist is picking chrysanthemums under the eastern fence, and the next second he's killing people and fighting with all his might, which is very abrupt. Then your plots that shape the protagonist's character of "I won't offend others unless I offend others" really create a huge sense of fragmentation. This makes the protagonist's character less like a land fairy and a bit intellectual.

Is the protagonist too useless? Just cultivate the body but not the brain? There is no whim in the True Immortal Golden Elixir Realm on land? The arranged backhand was activated and there was no sense at all. He was beaten to death a hundred miles away but was disturbed by a person in the same realm, and he became blind and deaf. It was not suppressed by the spirit treasure. When you arrive at the county seat, you will be massacred, and the family you save will be almost wiped out. There is nothing new in your plot. Next time you write about someone you know or a place you go to, something will happen in that place. The family is saving you, and you, a land god, put a curse on a little girl. Her parents have nothing. If there is a teleportation, why don't the whole family use it? Do you insist on leading to such a bad plot? Is this the golden elixir realm?

One word "pretend" sums up the author's writing ability. This author's writing style is excellent, much better than those sloppy and licking novices at the starting point. He also quotes some literary allusions from time to time to add literary polish to his novels. 😁 But he couldn't write the taste of a real Taoist master. It gave me the feeling that he was a fake trying his best to pretend to have that charm, but in fact he was just trying to imitate others. Ning Daoqi, portrayed by Huang Yi in Double Dragons of the Tang Dynasty, has the elegance of a carefree wandering in Zhuangzi's works, just like the Kunpeng of the North Ming Dynasty soaring upwards. One reading can give readers a sense of immortality. 😁And what about you? The protagonist he created was a low-end knockoff who was pretending to be a fake. To put it bluntly, he was fake, so fake that it was extremely unnatural, like a poor clown actor, and he couldn't perform that kind of charm.

True-Rhubarb Meditation

What about the avatar? Why did the cover of the book change? Let me show you the original picture

The Monk in the Mountains depicts the feeling of cultivating immortality that I have always pursued. Although it has not been updated due to various reasons, it is still at the top of my bookshelf! I also pay attention to the news from time to time. When I saw it today, it turned out to be a fake corpse! I'm looking forward to the new work of the talented scholar. I haven't mentioned anything yet, so I'm following the new book. Come on!

It was okay in the front, except for the somewhat forced scene in Baili County, which was barely bearable. But what happened to the little girl? Your savior is so pissed off, but you, a god, don't have any backhand or sense? As long as the little girl is protected, is it difficult to draw two more talismans? Forced plot killing, please save the little girl's parents, not the little girl. The same kind of bad fate, Zhuyu, don't you know how to learn from it? Not to mention such a great kindness, even a predestined person will be helped. As for dying so miserably? Can't even copy homework? It is estimated that 80% of readers will not be able to read this book until this point.

From the previous plots of the charlatans, to the fact that a dog raised by an expert has caused trouble, don't act like a dog is worth more than a human being, or that a prime minister's dog is more valuable than a third-rank official. Are the charlatans' schemes very harmful to you? Was there any intention to stab you in the back? Or do they want to come here to learn skills and want to curry favor with you because they see how good you are? You can just ignore them! How come the Taoist nobles are sending you to the bliss of the next life? Your self-cultivation as a master does not mean killing people and setting fires without batting an eyelid. Please convey your positive outlook. What you write is that of a master, not a domineering president! ! ! It was okay at first, but the three views I wrote were all wrong. But will anyone who goes to the mountain to learn from a teacher without your permission be thrown out? You'd better look at Han Yu's master and say that your attitude is like those who despise the master-disciple relationship. Since you look down on them and are unwilling to accept them, just ignore them. If you rely on calculations to get up the mountain, you can learn how the Taoist priests from Laoshan dealt with it. It's not about killing people, it's not about throwing them out, it's about using your brain. An expert doesn't have well-developed limbs and a simple mind, he only knows how to hit people. If you follow the way it is written at the beginning, the protagonist's actions will be quite reasonable, but others will see that he is completely overbearing later on. I am not criticizing your writing style, nor am I criticizing you for changing the outline, nor am I criticizing the plot. What I am criticizing is the three views. What I am criticizing is doing the things of a gangster in the name of an expert. Those who follow me will prosper, and those who go against me will perish. So isn't it good for you to write about the emperor? Maybe it will be praised unanimously. You tell me whether you are tired or not, but you still get criticized. Inexplicably, it reminds me of those people in universities who use the name of professors and scholars to do research in the name of doing research, but actually do things that want to be officials.

I have read seventy-four chapters so far. The first few chapters were quite good, but then they fell apart. The two green and white snakes said to the protagonist when they appeared, "Qingqiu Ridge, three hundred miles of Qinchuan, demons cannot appear, and everyone who sees them will bow their heads." What a great reputation! The result? Neither the monsters nor the human cultivators at the back knew the protagonist. The sixth realm in the article is already a high-end combat power. In the Yunshan disaster, two seventh realms and a dozen sixth realms died, and the low-end ones were basically dead; when Duoduo was saved in Chudi, two seventh realms and more than a dozen sixth realms died; the third floor owner caused trouble, and the third floor of the twelfth floor building died. There are only seven sixth realms of human race in the huge Shu region. Even if other places are ten times better than it, it won't take long for the high-end combat power in this world to be killed by the protagonist. The routine in the article is: the protagonist becomes a hermit, the villain angers the protagonist, the protagonist is born to kill the villain, and then continues to be a hermit, another villain angers the protagonist, the protagonist is born to kill the villain, and then returns home to continue to be a hermit... The title of the book is The Self-cultivation of the Master, I saw the master, where is the self-cultivation? Finally, I would like to summarize my opinion: there are too many bugs.

True-Land Immortal-Li Xuan