[Western Crossover] Do You Have to Inherit Your Lover to Become Robin?

[Completed: Winged Bucket x Batgirl, [DC] Batgirl, but a Villainess]

[Completed: AK Bucket x Batgirl, [DC] What If You Heard Robin Calling for Help in Arkham]

If Bruce's rumored lover is Batman, then it's only reasonable that his newly found daughter would date Robin, right?

Bruce: ...Wait, Elise, never mind everything else.

Bruce: There have been several Robins. Which one are we talking about?

The first time Dick met Elise was on a gargoyle in Gotham.

One of her feet dangled precariously, and she looked as though she might fall from the sky at any moment. Her figure seemed far too frail in the night wind.

"Hey!" Robin, wearing green-scaled shorts, did a backflip in midair and landed silently on the next gargoyle over. "Do you need help, miss?"

The girl, who had been expressionless until that moment, smiled and held out her hand. "I came looking for you, Robin. I'll be your lover."

Jason never thought anyone would mistake him for someone else.

Okay, sure, he was wearing the Robin suit. But his jumps weren't as graceful as the circus kid's, his build wasn't as tall and straight as the first Robin's, and he wasn't as popular as the Boy Wonder... So why did this young lady mistake him for someone else?

Jason considered correcting her, but she seemed to think he was some kind of "second personality" and insisted, "Batman is a vampire, so of course Robin can adjust his body at will, too." Forget it! Something this important should obviously be explained to his girlfriend (or maybe ex-girlfriend?) by the person involved!

Or maybe... Jason would come back from Ethiopia and tell her the truth.

He might not be a "replacement" after all. Maybe she would choose him, too, right?

When Tim volunteered to become Robin, he never expected to be asked this.

"Robin." Bathed in the light of the Bat-Signal, Elise looked expectantly at him. "What was the secret you said you'd tell me when you came back last time?"

The future Red Robin broke into a cold sweat. ...No! The second Wayne son's death absolutely could not be tied to the changing of the Robins!

He would have to pretend to be the previous Robin... Batman never said becoming Robin came with this kind of problem!

"Tt." Damian arrogantly lifted his chin. "Becoming Robin means I can inherit him? Excellent. I want..."

Bruce's pupils trembled. "Noooooooo!!!"

*

The only Robin disinherited (1.37-meter version) was forced into the judges' seat. "So. Todd is the side piece, Drake is the fourth..."

"Wait!" Spoiler poked her head out. "I'm the fourth!"

The legitimate Nightwing looked proud, while Red Robin, demoted to fifth, shrank back.

"Hmph." Two hundred pounds of scorn. "At least that's better than someone who isn't even qualified to be sixth."

Amid the chaotic battle and general pandemonium, the ever-composed Alfred spoke calmly. "Perhaps I should brush up on wedding preparations in advance. As their father, you'll offer the newlyweds your blessing, won't you, Master Bruce?"

Bruce: ...Wait, so which son is it?

*Also known as What Even Batman Doesn't Know x

*It's still Batfamily fiction, but the focus is romance.

*Mindless Mary Sue indulgence. Logic takes a back seat to romance.

*I wanted to include Stephanie, but this is still a boy-girl romance.

*Thanks to my friends for helping with some of the promotional copy!

Here's a teaser for an upcoming story, www:

[DC] Keep an Eye on the Kryptonians, Save the Suicide Attempt

After Superman is killed by Doomsday, you, who have already failed at suicide three times, begin another attempt.

Superman is dead, and Clark is gone, too. This time, no one will stop you.

Until you see a tiny version of Superman fly right up to you, wearing sunglasses and a leather jacket with the LexCorp logo on the shoulder, and striking a cocky pose.

...Seriously, again?

Wasn't Superman supposed to be the last Kryptonian?

You declare Lex Luthor permanently disqualified from ever receiving your vote for president. Permanently.

*

"Is life always this painful, or is it only like this when you're a kid?"

"That's just how life is." Clark tells you, "But even if it's cloudy today and raining tomorrow, one day you'll have a clear, sunny sky."

He smiles, as warm as sunshine. "What if good news comes tomorrow?"

Theme: Heroes save the world, and they can save you, too.