When a story's bones and flesh are complete, all it needs is one final confession that cuts through the noise and reaches straight into the soul.
Ahh, F6, you two have to be happy together forever!
Please read the companion pieces, Words Against My Will and Out of Season.
Chen Sixiu: The lamplighter who lost his way while watching from the sidelines
Chen Sixiu always thought he was the one holding the lamp, coolly seeing through every emotional maze as an observer. He was proud of his ability to discern the pain Ye Zuize kept hidden, and proud that he could stay clear-headed amid all the glitz and decadence.
Until one moment, when he realized he had somehow wandered deep into the maze himself.
· The moment he fell: Perhaps it was one late night when he was joking around as usual. Seven parts drunk and three parts sober, Ye Zuize rested his head on Chen Sixiu's shoulder and mumbled, "Chen Sixiu, if you weren't here, I wouldn't even know who to perform this show for..." In that moment, Chen Sixiu found that he could no longer smile. An unfamiliar feeling struck him hard in the heart. He no longer wanted to be a spectator in this show. He wanted to be the leading man.
· His inner struggle: His pain came from being "clear-headed." He knew too well how deeply Ye Zuize loved Wen Suyan, a love that ran like instinct in his blood and bones. He was jealous of the deep love that belonged to Wen Suyan, yet his heart ached for Ye Zuize as he abandoned himself. He made a rule for himself: "Don't embrace a moth that can't see the light." Yet he broke it for Ye Zuize again and again, until he ended up burned.
· The transformation of his feelings: His feelings for Ye Zuize changed from pitying him as he "watched the show," to keeping him company as he "joined the cast," and finally to an intense, painful possessiveness. He might suddenly grip Ye Zuize's wrist and say in a voice only the two of them could hear, "Ye Zuize, when you shield him from drinks, do you ever think that I might worry about you too?"
Ye Zuize: The sea illuminated by a watchful light
Ye Zuize silently sacrificed all the passion and all-or-nothing courage of his life to a hopeless love. He built a lonely sea that no one could approach, unaware that a lamp had already illuminated the shore for him.
· The moment he wavered: When he habitually dropped every pretense in front of Chen Sixiu and revealed his most exhausted, disheveled self, Chen Sixiu didn't brush it off with a joke as usual. Instead, he gently drew him into his arms and murmured, "Ye Zuize, with me, you don't have to be so sensible." In that moment, the solid world he had built cracked for the first time.
· His inner struggle: He was used to licking his wounds alone in the dark, believing that being loved was a debt he would have to repay. He feared owing anyone, and feared even more that his heart belonged to someone else, yet he would have to give half of it to Chen Sixiu. It would be unfair and profane to them both. He would push Chen Sixiu away: "Don't be so good to me. I can't repay you."
· The transformation of his feelings: At first, he only sought the comfort of a "sounding board" in Chen Sixiu. Later, he began to crave that unique affection and attention. He would unconsciously search for Chen Sixiu's figure in a crowd and grow restless when he joked around with someone else. Only belatedly did he realize that the glacier named Wen Suyan was still there, but a warm lake had quietly formed beside it, willing to receive his reflection.
How their relationship unfolds: A three-act play from "sounding board" to "harbor"
With such deeply rooted characterizations, the progression of their relationship has a solid foundation. This won't be a simple story of salvation, but a complicated process in which two broken souls help one another find their bearings in the dark.
Act One: A secret symbiosis
Their relationship began with a dangerous balance: one needed a sounding board, the other willingly played the part. Chen Sixiu perfectly concealed his growing possessiveness of Ye Zuize behind a joking pose as his "number one CP fan." Ye Zuize was happy to have such a safe, harmless confidant, until he noticed that Chen Sixiu's gaze was gradually growing different when he looked at him.
Classic scene: In a private bar on the top floor of a casino, Ye Zuize is once again drinking himself into a stupor over Wen Suyan. Chen Sixiu takes his glass and drains it in one gulp. The bottom of the glass taps against the marble counter, making a clear, warning sound.
"Ye Zuize, guess what?" Chen Sixiu turns his face toward him, his thumb rubbing hard against the corner of his damp eye. His voice is amused, but his gaze is as cold as ice. "Your number one CP fan is officially quitting the fandom today."
"...Why?"
Chen Sixiu leans closer. A silver chain dangling from the collar of his floral shirt brushes Ye Zuize's collarbone, while his aggressive cologne completely envelops him.
"Because I've fallen for one of the people in the CP."
Act Two: A clear-headed descent
The balance is broken, and the two become caught in a push and pull. Chen Sixiu is tormented by guilt at "taking advantage of him when he's vulnerable" and by the love he can't suppress. Ye Zuize is at a loss between the habits of his old love and his fear of this new affection. They begin using "being drunk" as an excuse to test boundaries.
Classic scene: After Chen Sixiu once again pins him against the bathroom wall and kisses him "while drunk," Ye Zuize grabs the collar of his floral shirt and asks, breathless, "Chen Sixiu, are you fucking drunk or not?"
Chen Sixiu rubs his nose against Ye Zuize's temple, sounding both enamored and resigned, and gives the famous answer:
"Ye Zuize, you're the drink that gets me drunk."
He licks the drop of water beside the black stud in Ye Zuize's ear and says hoarsely, "And I've been too drunk to want to wake up for a long time."
Act Three: The lighthouse and the homecoming
The turning point comes with a major outside conflict, such as a family crisis. Ye Zuize instinctively bears it alone, but Chen Sixiu steps in with an unyielding resolve and clears away the storm for him. Ye Zuize finally understands that a "way out" is just self-indulgence, while a "harbor" is a warmth he can truly rely on.
Classic scene: After the crisis, Ye Zuize finds Chen Sixiu and, for the first time, removes the black stud that symbolizes his silent, unrequited love. He places it in Chen Sixiu's palm.
"I've had it for many years," Ye Zuize says, looking into his eyes, his voice soft. "But now, I don't need a 'way out' anymore."
He takes Chen Sixiu's hand. "I need a harbor."
Chen Sixiu clasps their fingers together, the little stud pressed between their palms like the final chapter of an old story and the first of a new one. His peach-blossom eyes curve into a smile. Still in his usual flippant tone, he says something that weighs a ton:
"Congratulations, Ye Zuize. You've found the most reliable person in the world."
· Chen Sixiu: "Everyone thinks I'm the most unreliable playboy in Macau, but Ye Zuize, I'll show you that you've found the most reliable harbor in the world."
· Ye Zuize: "I once thought my love was a black thing that had to stay hidden from the light. Then I met you, Chen Sixiu. You taught me that love can be colorful too."
Thesis: I don't know.
