My Disciples Are All Weird!!

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After transmigrating seven hundred years ago, Qiao Shu muddled through one challenge after another and eventually made a name for himself, becoming one of the renowned Sword Venerables of the cultivation world.

On the day of his 771st birthday, his golden finger finally arrived, fashionably late.

Qiao Shu was moved. Was his next chapter going to be about cultivating until he ascended, then shattering the void and ruling the entire universe

Taking a closer look, Qiao Shu furrowed his brow. What on earth was this?

It was a world that mashed together all kinds of novels.

Qiao Shu had landed a whole collection of master archetypes. His disciples included not only Dragon Proudheaven and Phoenix Proudheaven, but also a scumbag male lead caught in a tragic love triangle and a submissive who endured a torturous romance...

And he, Qiao Shu, the famous leader of the Seven Sword Venerables, was destined to play the role of kicking someone out of the sect, breaking up a couple, denying someone's lineage, and suffering through a substitute romance.

The seven-hundred-year-old man slowly formed a question mark.

He could put up with the first three, but what on earth was that last one?!

According to the book, his youngest disciple seemed ordinary, but was actually the cultivation world's number-one succubus. As his master, he had long since fallen hopelessly in love with the disciple, but dared not confess because of social conventions.

His second personality, however, didn't care about any of that, and met with the disciple in secret every day.

After learning what his second personality had done, Sword Venerable Qiao was wracked with anguish. Yet he was also deeply attracted to his succubus disciple. The disciple seemed to be passionately in love with the second personality, but in truth treated that personality as a stand-in for Sword Venerable Qiao.

After a long, torturous romance, both of Sword Venerable Qiao's personalities and the youngest disciple lived happily ever after.

Qiao Shu: ...

He understood all the words put together, but there was one problem...

The youngest disciple was his second personality!

So in the end, this was still a story about falling in love with yourself, right?

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Yan He had existed for Qiao Shu alone ever since the day he was born.

They were like flesh and blood, inseparable.

After spending hundreds of years together, he had thought things would always stay that way.

Who could have guessed that one day after Qiao Shu emerged from seclusion, he would put an arm around him and ask, "Yan He, do you like me?"

Yan He's fingers trembled. His voice was as gentle as ever. "Master, no one can help loving themselves."

Later, Qiao Shu lay sprawled on the bed, covered in marks. His friend sent him a message, sounding gleeful: "Qiao Shu, did you know there's a ghost in your house?"

Qiao Shu: ...

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1. A cultivation-world mash-up. Qiao Shu has maxed-out combat strength and is an over-the-top show-off.

2. Self-romance. Qiao Shu is the bottom, Yan He is the top.

3. A lighthearted cultivation story with a side couple. Extremist shippers, please give it a pass.

The main story began being drafted on December 16, 2024.

The blurb was rewritten on August 6.

Theme: The stars may sparkle, but I alone steal the show.