You’re Straight, So Are You Staying That Way?

Check out my upcoming story, The Bizarre Boyfriend Wish Machine My name... Well, my name doesn’t really matter, because I’m the male lead of an Omegaverse novel. My day-to-day job mainly consists of getting done this way and that by all sorts of men. In short, this is an Omegaverse novel with no plot at all. Ever since I awakened to self-awareness, I’ve been trying to figure out how to kill my own consciousness. But after I died, I was reborn in an entirely normal new world. I got a new System and a new identity: Lemon Gin, a senior executive in a transnational criminal organization that always wears black. You can call me Lemon. I love the organization. It has a broad range of business operations, high salaries, and great benefits. But I love this world even more, because the men here are all straight! When I sling an arm around the blond, dark-skinned guy, he doesn’t pin me down with a smoldering look. He just throws me over his shoulder. When I open the door to the silver-haired, green-eyed man late at night, he doesn’t get drugged and pin me down. He just points a gun at me and tells me to get the hell out of his house. When I make a loving breakfast for the cat-eyed young man, he doesn’t wolf it down and pin me down. He just reminds me not to use sugar instead of salt next time. When I share a bed with the curly-haired guy in sunglasses, he doesn’t imprison me and pin me down. He just thrashes around the whole bed because he sleeps so badly... Most touching of all is Rye. He dates women of his own accord! Rye... *sniff*. You have to be happy! What a normal world this is. I decided to unilaterally declare them my dearest friends and give everything I had to protect them. Then one day, I got a superpower: mind-reading. Equipped with this superpower, I happily set out to hear what my friends thought of me. Blond and dark-skinned: [...Yuki is so tempting.] Silver-haired and green-eyed: [I bet he’d sound so good when he’s coming.] Cat-eyed young man: [If Chika finds out how I feel, will he hate me?] Curly-haired guy in sunglasses: [Want to fuck him.] Ah, yes, that’s right. My name is Chika Yuki... No, that’s not the point! Stay away from me! Tips: 1. First-person narration in Chapter One only, third-person narration thereafter. 2. An irresistibly beautiful, universally adored protagonist. 3. No choosing a favorite. There are different endings. (No Akai, but Hagi and Morofushi are included.) The Bizarre Boyfriend Wish Machine Yun Guixi once believed that when it came to love, one should be faithful and devoted until death. So, when a level-five anomaly mutated twice and he realized his boyfriend hadn’t escaped, he turned back without hesitation. He fought his way up to the eighteenth floor alone, drenched in blood as he opened a path to safety for him. But his boyfriend shoved him straight toward the anomaly. “Yun, you’re too badly hurt. We can’t get out together. I’ll avenge you. I’ll avenge you.” The anomaly swallowed Yun Guixi whole. When he opened his eyes again, he had returned to ten years earlier. He had just graduated from university. He hadn’t joined the Special Affairs Bureau yet, and he hadn’t met that damn bastard. So much for faithfulness and devotion until death. From today on, he’d fall in love with someone new every time. Given a second chance, Yun Guixi felt as if the world had taken a liking to him. It seemed the heavens could hear him. Each boyfriend he dated was more suited to his tastes than the last, almost as if they had been created to match his wishes exactly. He wanted someone obedient, and boyfriend A appeared. He wanted to try sleeping with someone broad-shouldered, narrow-waisted, and full of stamina, and when he lifted the covers, there was boyfriend B. He wished for a romance with the most beautiful person in the world, and boyfriend C showed up at his door. Yun Guixi felt something was off. “What if I wanted C’s face, B’s body, and A’s personality?” That very night, an exceptionally handsome man with a perfect physique cornered him against the bed. The man forcibly pried his knees apart and looked down at him, his gaze eerily gentle and obedient. “Is this... what you want?” Sticky tentacles crept over his body, invading the spaces between his fingers. Yun Guixi was forced to look up at him. “No matter what kind you like, I can become it for you.” Yun Guixi struggled to find his voice. “Actually, I like the kind with hair made of gemstones, skin decorated with gold, and clothes made entirely of banknotes. Can you turn into that?” The other man: “?” “Can’t you? It’s my one wish in a lifetime.” Yun Guixi lowered his eyes in disappointment, looking utterly dejected. The man immediately grew anxious. “D-don’t cry... I’ll think of something.” “I can give you anything you want.” Any object could be contaminated and become an anomaly. The most troublesome kind came from a person’s obsession. When someone died with an obsession too powerful, it attracted a great deal of contamination and gave rise to an anomaly. These were extremely rare, but once one formed, it was always level five and exceptionally dangerous. An ability user from the official agency reconstructed an image of what Yun Guixi’s shape-shifting little anomaly had looked like before it became an anomaly. On the white paper, a black-haired man seemed to stand amid the clouds, his expression cool and aloof, his bearing untouchable. Ability user: “Do you know him?” Yun Guixi paused. “I know him, and I don’t.” He didn’t know him in this life, but in his previous life, he had once glimpsed him from afar. He had been a legend in the inner world, someone who made everyone tremble with fear. They had met a few times. The man had been cold as ice and snow, and seemed never to have given him so much as a glance. “What is its obsession?” The ability user tapped the page. The black hair and red eyes turned into writhing tentacles, and for a moment, Yun Guixi felt that sticky sensation wrapping around him again. “I’m sorry to say it, but it’s you. You should know that this kind of anomaly can’t be completely destroyed while its obsession remains.” Yun Guixi pointed at himself. “So I have to kill myself first, and then kill it?” “Not exactly. Can’t you tell? Its obsession is pretty much to sleep with you.” Yun Guixi: “?” If I don’t go to hell, who will? Yun Guixi offered himself to the anomaly and tried every position he could think of to erase the tentacle monster’s obsession, but the creature was never satisfied. Yun Guixi couldn’t help crying. “Just tell me honestly, how many times did you think about me before you died?” The anomaly, now back in the form it had taken in life, still had an expression as cold as snow-capped mountains. It grabbed him by the ankle and pulled him back, lowering its eyes. “I thought about you...” “Countless times.” Theme: Love is two souls recognizing each other