Qin Shi Huang Loves Scrolling Short Videos

"My fascinating, short-lived ancestor only wanted a pill of immortality. He wasn't asking for the stars! Why wouldn't they give it to him?!"

Lines of text, each missing a few characters, flashed rapidly across a huge, transparent screen.

A moment later, a hand slowly reached out and tapped the screen. The text's scrolling speed suddenly slowed.

"Just give it to him! I can't study this awful English for another day!"

English?

"If I could transmigrate back in time, I'd absolutely bring him a world map!"

A world map?

"Hurry up and mail him Tang Sanzang! I'll pay the postage! QAQ"

Tang Sanzang?

"Maybe he's not your ancestor, but he definitely beat up your ancestor!"

???

"I'm dying! If they really gave him a pill of immortality, the whole world would probably be speaking Shaanxi dialect!"

Shaanxi?

-

In 235 BC, after learning that Lu Buwei had poisoned himself, King Ying Zheng of Qin finally felt a great weight lift from his heart.

That night, he dreamed he was in a strange place.

There were many voices praising him lavishly: "...unified the written script, standardized the tracks of carriages, unified the six states, standardized currency, weights, and measures, drove the Xiongnu north, conquered the Baiyue tribes in the south, abolished the feudal system, and established commanderies and counties. His virtue surpasses that of the Three Sovereigns, his achievements exceed those of the Five Emperors..."

There were also many bizarre strings of text that he could somehow understand perfectly: "My fascinating, short-lived ancestor..."

The more he listened, the more his heart raced.

But the feeling lasted only a few seconds.

Then he heard someone say, "What a pity he died too soon. Qin fell after just two generations."

Fell... fell...

Two generations... only two generations...

King Ying Zheng of Qin flew into a rage. Fusu!!!!!

Blurb posted on March 13. Screenshot saved.

Theme: Reach for the stars, but keep your feet on the ground.