On the Sword

For the first sixty-odd years of her life, Li Wangqing enjoyed the wonderful life of a lonely woman who never aged. Then, just before her seventieth birthday, she went on a trip in hopes of good luck in love and picked up a man-eating flower with a mouth full of lewd remarks. "Pleased to meet you. I'm an ordinary fairy who helps those in need. To cut a long story short, there's a vicious evil cultivator outside hurting people. Your first two wives may already have met with disaster." "...What are their names?" "How should I know? You can call the first two Wife A and Wife B. As for me..." Zhang Yue lifted her veil and gave her a look, then suddenly understood. "Wife C." [Affection: -50] "Want to do business? The kind where you trade your life." [Affection: 0] "You let people bully you without fighting back. Is that what a fairy does?" "Would you be happy if I got myself killed?" "I'll burn paper offerings for you. Well, if I remember." [Affection: 10] "Wife cakes. Are all wife cakes sweet?" "Most are filled with red bean or lotus seed paste. Some might be savory, too." "So are you sweet or savory?" [Affection: 50] "Wife cake, do you want the stars in the sky?" "Stop pulling shooting stars down! They'll hit someone!" [Affection: 80] "Compared to those who have only ever slandered you, is there... even the slightest chance you might favor me?" [Affection: 100] "You can't... teach me to love you, then forget me." Where the sea of stars meets, a lone boat finds barren shores. For ten thousand years, it has awaited this night. When you and I met, the heavens lowered their gaze, and frost fell over the mortal world. [A wicked evil god with a strong sense of agency who loves watching his wife embarrass herself x a sword cultivator, Wife C, who failed at lazing around and kept fighting until she became a god] Tags and warnings: A few characters definitely have brains no bigger than walnuts. Lots of baffling behavior that might trigger photosensitive epilepsy. A heroine who grows and thrives. Major angst. I'm definitely going to kill a few people as sacrifices to the heavens. You might laugh until you fart or cry until you melt. I'm a pure-love warrior. Being pretty is no match for going