[Western Crossover] I Fear Nothing After Moving into a Haunted House

Connie got an enviable internship at Osborn Industries. So she sold her old house in Queens, gathered the little money she had left after paying tuition, and moved into Apartment 7 on the 13th floor of 666 United Nations Plaza in Manhattan.

Those terribly unlucky numbers made her friend Peter uneasy. After digging up the building's horrifying history in the library, he started urging Connie to move out almost every day.

But Connie scoffed at the urban legends. In a grave, earnest tone, she asked her childhood friend, "Peter, do you know what's scarier than a haunted house?"

The little spider boy shook his head, baffled.

Connie lamented bitterly, "Being broke! I sold my house and drained my parents' entire inheritance, and it still wasn't enough to get me through college! I had to take out an astronomical student loan, and my scholarship barely makes a dent! That damn Rockefeller dorm charges me two thousand a month, which is over twenty grand a year! This haunted apartment is two hundred square meters, with three bedrooms, two living rooms, and a balcony overlooking the East River, and it only costs seven hundred a month! How is that any different from getting a mansion for free?!"

That sounded so reasonable. Also broke, Peter silently calculated Connie's tuition and his own future college expenses, and shamefully began to waver.

United Nations Plaza was only a few blocks from Osborn Tower, and it was easy to get to campus from there. With a price so cheap it was obviously suspicious, and such a perfect location, Connie wouldn't be separated from that apartment even if it were haunted. Not even the arrival of a demon could make her leave!

A few months after Connie moved in, a nervous little spider boy hesitantly knocked on his girlfriend's door.

Against the backdrop of furniture that made spooky sound effects and moved around whenever it pleased, Connie calmly put away a cross-shaped dagger covered in the blood of some unidentified creature. "What is it? I'm busy. Spit it out."

The fearless Spider-Man glanced at the paranormal activity filling the apartment, swallowed hard, and asked in a trembling voice, "I wanted to say... Um, I finally decided which college to apply to. It's nearby, so... Connie, do you still need a roommate to split the rent?"

Set in a superhero universe and mixing in all kinds of American horror movies, including Rosemary's Baby, Apartment 1303, 1408, The Haunting of Hill House, The Cabin in the Woods, the Paranormal Activity series, the Child's Play series, the Final Destination series, James Wan's horror universe, various American urban legends, and more.

The male lead is Spider-Man. The female lead is two years ahead of Peter in school, a glamorous American sweetheart with blonde hair and blue eyes, and a mature, confident vibe. She's incredibly brave. She looks like the useless, shrieking girl from a horror movie, but when she gets scared, she'll curse up a storm and swing an axe at a ghost's head without hesitation.

This is an inspirational story about a broke person using their wits to battle spirits, demons, ghosts, and every other kind of monster in order to save money.

It's just a sweet romance (probably).

Reader warning:

Out of character, with personal headcanons and authorial insertions.

Written on a sudden inspiration, with no advance chapters, no outline, and no logic. The writing is at an elementary-school level. As long as it's fun, that's all that matters.

Updates whenever the mood strikes.

This is an abandoned project.

Theme: Broke people fear nothing!