Yun Wu, the last dragon in the world, woke from a deep sleep to find everything transformed. After losing people's faith, he had shrunk to the size of a chopstick.
No big deal. He just needed to find a human who truly believed he was a dragon and cuddle them fiercely. Then he could return to his full dragon form and rule the mountains and rivers once more!
The good news: thanks to his outstanding powers of persuasion, he quickly found a suitable human. The bad news: the human was a staunch materialist who insisted he was a pig-nosed snake!!!
Yun Wu wriggled into the human's cup again and tried to persuade him face-to-face, his little face earnest:
"I am a dragon. Send me fifty... Hey, hey! Don't cover the cup! Don't seal me away!"
After a chaotic struggle, the human looked at the tiny four-legged snake before him with a complicated expression. "You're a dragon?"
Yun Wu puffed out his straight little chest and raised his piggy snout proudly. "That's right! I am the true Son of Heaven... Hey, hey! That's wrong, that's wrong! Why are you covering the cup again?"
Fortunately, he eventually made it to the modern world with the human.
Yun Wu also picked up a new hobby: Send me fifty, send me fifty, send me fifty.
·
Fu Wei: once a legendary containment specialist, one day a time regressor, and now a patient in a psychiatric hospital, suffering from severe auditory and visual hallucinations as well as dissociative identity disorder.
Even if a pink little pig-nosed snake poked its head out of his cup, sleeping bag, backpack... and said, "Hello. Send me fifty in faith, and one day I shall make you a general of the Four Seas!" it was perfectly understandable.
It's cute. I'll just keep it like a kitten.
But love makes you grow flesh and blood, and being loved for long enough makes you grow a marsupial pouch. Fu Wei posted a photo with the caption: "Love is always feeling you owe someone."
Netizens:
"Damn, he raised a pig-nosed snake into a pig."
"I can see the truck, but where's the snake?"
"Love is always feeling you owe someone, but this little pig can wait."
Fu Wei gave it some serious thought and finally decided to put the snake on a light diet.
He never expected to open his eyes and see a naked young man standing with hands on his hips, demanding furiously, "Human! Send me fifty!"
·
Ever since the little pig, no, the little dragon, turned human, there were all sorts of new ways to send the dragon fifty: kisses, cuddles, and lifting him up high.
Every time he got his fifty, the dragon would feel Fu Wei's abs, bite his pecs a couple of times, then boast smugly, "Human, when I grow up, I'll marry you and make you my dragon consort!"
Until one day, he discovered that Fu Wei was a human spy sent to corrupt the dragon. His mission was to keep the dragon's mouth shut, rein in his legs, and stop him from waking up and causing destruction!
The dragon limped along, clutching his rear, and went dark!
"Human! You have to send the dragon a hundred today!"
·
[Legendary Calamity: Mountain Dragon. Mimic form: pink pig-nosed snake. Status: Dormant. Suspected to suffer from severe delusions that can easily affect reality.]
[Do not respond! Do not respond! Do not respond!]
[Except Fu Wei]
Evidence archived on August 10, 2026
Theme: Love is always feeling you owe someone
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