Three Kingdoms: Prepared for Anything, Yet Ah Dou Just Wants to Slack Off

In the eighth month of the second year of Zhangwu, after the disastrous defeat at Yiling, Liu Bei retreated to Yong'an, and Shu Han stood on the brink of ruin. No one expected Liu Shan, the crown prince who was governing the state from Chengdu, to suddenly arrive in Yong'an and make a shocking wager with Liu Bei: If Cao Pi failed to defeat Sun Quan, Liu Bei would accept the punishment for his disastrous eastern campaign and return to Chang'an within five years, where he would beg forgiveness before the tomb of Emperor Gaozu, carrying thorn branches on his back! With Liu Shan's support, Liu Bei rallied and set out to rebuild his empire. He allied with Sun Quan in the east, made peace with the tribes in the west, pacified the barbarian tribes in the south, and launched a northern campaign into Guanzhong, stubbornly propping up the tottering Han dynasty once more. Just as the Han restoration seemed within reach, Crown Prince Liu Shan began wanting more and more to lie flat. Watching Liu Shan recline on a bamboo chair, lazily waving a feather fan. “A Dou, Cao Rui is only three years older than you, yet he's already personally leading campaigns. The ruler of Wei is clever, and that's no blessing for our Han.” “Father, what good is his cleverness? Does he have you for a father? Having you is enough for me!” When Liu Bei urged him to work harder, Liu Shan fired back with a soul-searching question: “Father, at your age, how can you sleep at night?” “Have you asked yourself today: have you restored the Han?” When Liu Bei lamented his laziness, Liu Shan quoted a timeless admonition: “Father, you have barely begun your great undertaking. How can you let it fail halfway? The realm is divided in three, and Yi Province is exhausted. This is truly a moment of grave danger, when our very survival is at stake.” Liu Bei: So I'm the only one busting my back to restore the Han? Liu Shan: Father handles conquering the realm; your son handles taking concubines and having children! Liu Bei: (pretending to be furious) Get up and speak! Liu Shan: (scrambling to his feet) Father, please speak calmly. Don't get angry; anger harms the liver...