Back to My Days in the Spring Boudoir

Lord Li, an Academician of the Hanlin Academy, has three beloved daughters. His eldest is lovely and clever, and his youngest is renowned throughout the capital for her beauty. Li Mingchun is the second daughter. After her parents arranged for her elder sister and younger sister to stay at home and take in husbands, she was promised to a jinshi next door who was a full twelve years older than her.

Her father said, "Your husband passed the highest imperial examination. His family may be poor, but his future is limitless. You mustn't act superior."

Her mother said, "Dear, your sisters are both staying here. How could I bear to let you marry far away? The house next door is separated from ours by just one wall. If you marry there, we won't have to suffer the pain of being separated from our own flesh and blood."

Her sisters gathered around her. Her eldest sister smiled and agreed, while her youngest envied her for marrying an official.

So Li Mingchun obediently married the man next door.

She had been quiet and submissive as a maiden, and she remained meek and long-suffering as a wife, meeting everyone's expectations. She endured a harsh mother-in-law above and a spoiled, unruly younger brother-in-law below. By the time her husband pledged his life to another woman, Li Mingchun had kept her misery bottled up for so long that she had been bedridden with illness for ages.

After she died, she watched her father cast aside his usual dignity and lead the servants next door to demand justice for her. Her mother wept until her eyes were red, and her death set both the Li and Xu families in an uproar.

Li Mingchun thought she should have no regrets. Her family really did love her.

When she opened her eyes again, she found herself resting her head on the desk in her maiden chamber. A crabapple branch reached through the window, its petals brushing her cheek.

A maid spoke softly outside the door. "Miss, Madam and the others have already gone to the banquet."

Li Mingchun remembered. It was the year she came of age. Her mother had taken her elder and younger sisters to a banquet, forgetting her as she always did.

The same thing had happened so many times that she thought she must have forgotten it by now. She never expected to remember it so clearly after returning to this moment.

She had too many regrets, too many grievances, most of which had once seemed like nothing out of the ordinary.

It was cruel to recognize, little by little, that she was not loved. So when she later asked to be adopted into her second uncle's family, became a stranger to her former family, refused to listen or look, and stopped keeping silent, lashing out at everyone like scorching lava, that was only natural, wasn't it?

Theme: Love yourself before loving others. You are the one you can rely on most.