I Think I'm Kind of a Big Shot

Please check out my upcoming novel, "Flying on a Sword, But It's a Nuke"! =v=

Gu Shangzhou always thought he was a big shot.

But all he had around him was a barren gorge and a thatched hut.

He was furious. How could a big shot have no treasures, beauties, or, most importantly, underlings?

So Gu Shangzhou stationed himself at the edge of the barren gorge, waiting for treasures, beauties, and underlings to come to him.

Xie Lingfeng, the leading disciple of the immortal sect, has always hated being praised for his looks. Yet while on a mission, he fell into the gorge and was forced by a man in an exceptionally rough style of clothing to... wear women's clothes!

Zuo Qianhuang, young lord of the demon realm, has always hated being told to follow the rules. Yet after being ambushed and falling into the gorge, someone whose face he couldn't even make out changed his clothes and made him serve tea and water every day.

Gu Shangzhou was quite pleased with this, and kept going into the gorge every day to pick up more underlings.

The chosen ones of the heavens looked at each other. Unable to beat Gu Shangzhou one-on-one, they tried to join forces and resist the weirdo.

They joined forces to resist... something was wrong. There was a mole among them.

"No way!"

"If anyone's going to do it, I got here first!"

"I want to be his number-one underling!"

The flimsy resistance alliance, formed only moments ago, fell apart completely.

Gu Shangzhou nodded in satisfaction. He stroked the little fox's tail with one hand and the beauty's hand, which was even bigger than his, with the other. As the direct disciple of Medicine King Valley played the chi for him, he sampled the grapes offered by the young lord of the demon realm.

His underlings were all so well-behaved! This was how a big shot should live!

.

Outside the gorge, the demons, monsters, and humans of the three realms gathered and decided to explore it on a chosen day and rescue their disciples.

They charged in with swords drawn, only to find the gorge calm and peaceful, nothing like the notorious gathering place of all evil.

Then they came face-to-face with the chosen ones, who had seized the chance to fight over titles while Gu Shangzhou was away.

At the critical moment, Gu Shangzhou happened to return to the valley.

A mighty surge of sword energy split a mountain, and a fierce wind stopped precisely before the leader of the immortal sect.

His voice was clear, both unfamiliar and familiar.

"Who gave you permission to bully my disciples?"

The wielder of that sword energy held no sword, only a branch. Standing some distance away, he suppressed everyone with his imposing presence. The hair at his forehead stirred without a breeze, revealing eyes as bright as the full moon.

It was Gu Shangzhou.

Before the chosen ones could pretend to be well-behaved, they saw their usually composed and particularly stern sect leader drop his sword and burst into tears.

"...M-Master Ancestor..."

The Master Ancestor of Lingxian Sect, who had split mountains and rivers with a single sword and established order in a chaotic age all by himself... had returned.

.

"I would extend his life for eternity."

1. A cunning, scheming, green-tea-style, evil incarnate gong x a shou who always thinks he's a big shot, and actually is one. One-on-one romance.

2. A silly, comedic story.

Theme: Even when faced with despair, never give up hope.