You Think You Can Put a Cone on the Strongest, Gojo Satoru?

[The biggest OOC in this story is that Satoru Gojo is the strongest. No arguments, and please don't let the author betray us.]

Your name is Tang Yin. You're dead, and you've been buried underground for who knows how long.

Then one day, it rains so hard, like that night Yiping went to ask her father for money, that it washes your grave away completely.

The moment your home is gone, you suddenly remember that you might, maybe, have a husband.

You can't remember what he looks like or what his name is, but you remember he's strong, arrogant, and infuriating.

Most importantly, you feel like your husband is still alive!

Your wife has lost her only home. Surely it's only right for a husband to take in his homeless wife, isn't it?!

With that thought, you set out on a journey to find your husband.

*

On your first day in the big city, you meet a white-haired sorcerer who claims to be the strongest jujutsu sorcerer.

He's handsome, strong (the strongest), arrogant, and absolutely infuriating.

His first words are: "You vermin! Interrupt my line for dessert and I'll tear you limb from limb!"

A newly formed special-grade curse instantly turns to dust.

In a flash of inspiration, you realize: He must be your good-for-nothing husband!

The instant you reach this conclusion, you collapse, grab his leg, and weep in front of everyone, your tears falling like pear blossoms in the rain. "Honey, I've had such a hard time finding you. You have no idea what I've been through... I lost my home, I have no money or food, and I wandered around digging for wild vegetables, hiking hundreds of miles through the mountains, all to find you. Honey, don't leave me!"

Onlookers: What kind of scumbag dresses so well and carries limited-edition desserts, yet makes his wife dig for wild vegetables in the mountains?

Gojo, a teacher at Jujutsu High who has been single since birth at age twenty-six: Six.

*

One day, your "husband" takes you to the school where he works. You see a pink-haired boy, and that loathsome mouth on his face. The first thing he says when he sees you is: "Heh, wanna fight, you ugly woman?!"

Then you understand. This worthless piece of trash, neither quite dead nor alive, is the one you remember as your "husband."

Gojo Satoru, right away: Hey, ex-husband!

#Your wife is fine, and the next second she's mine!

*

Gojo Satoru has picked up a wife for free on the street. She's beautiful and powerful, and he can use her to deal with those annoying old-timers.

But his wife is so outstanding that she attracts all kinds of admirers, including a best friend who defected years ago and a weirdo with stitches on his head. They're always trying to steal her away and make him wear an eco-friendly hat.

Gojo Satoru's response: What are you so smug about? You homewreckers! Smart Gojo here is a legally married husband with the papers to prove it! (Waves the marriage certificate furiously.)

Until one day, his wife suddenly wakes up and says:

"I remember now. My husband actually has black hair and black eyes..."

The Six-Eyed Child of Prophecy, Gojo Satoru, born with white hair and blue eyes: To be honest, I had black hair and black eyes when I was born too. Then I got sick...

Tang Yin: Premature white hair? A young man going gray? You're sick, you need treatment! (Sympathetic look.jpg)

Gojo: ...

#So I'm the homewrecker?! (Gojo's personal clown mask.jpg)

#For my wife, I'll become the husband she imagined!

[Reading guide]

1. Gojo is all about the memes! Please don't flame the author if you don't like it! The main story is written in second person.

2. There are some melodramatic mistaken-identity scenes. The heroine doesn't actually have a husband; her confused memories just make her think someone is her husband.

3. The pairing will most likely be Gojo, since our clever Gojo understands the importance of being a legally married husband with papers to prove it. But the author's pen might suddenly get stolen by another character.

4. This is essentially a comedy, and there will be some OOC moments. There's lots of classic homewrecking, because the heroine is both beautiful and powerful.

Theme: If you're going to fall in love, you have to take it seriously and be responsible!