The Taoist Priest Keeps a Cat [Classic of Mountains and Seas]

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New story now underway: "You Call This 4399? [Infinite]", an infinite-flow story with no romance. Blurb below.

Other upcoming stories: "Governing in Two Parts [Selfcest]", a historical spin-off romance; "You Know This Is Illegal, Right?!", a female-led quick transmigration story.

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Blurb:

After graduating from graduate school, Lin Yimo inherited his family's ancestral property: a dilapidated Taoist temple. It had no employees and no worshippers, sat halfway up a mountain where daily necessities had to be carried up by hand, and required the head priest to do every bit of work and pay all the expenses himself. Even the main hall's roof had several holes in it, leaving the ancestral master's statue to get rained on.

What could he do? He was the only one left in their lineage. Lin Yimo had no choice but to take on the miserable mess.

Not long after officially becoming the sole priest in charge, Lin Yimo found a black cat and a man named Lin Fei. Both said they could work and would be happy as long as they got a meal.

Lin Yimo studied the ledger. They were losing money either way, so what difference would two more mouths make? With a wave of his hand, he took them both in.

Thanks to Lin Yimo's painstaking efforts, the temple flourished and drew in worshippers. His unconventional management style even landed him and the temple on trending searches several times, making them famous across the country. His fellow priests had nothing but praise for his temple.

The temple was bustling with visitors. Its newly built halls were imposing, and the towering golden statues inside shimmered with divine light. Seeing how well his temple was doing, Lin Yimo couldn't help beaming.

But then an unexpected incident made Lin Yimo realize that the cat he'd found might not be a cat, and the man he'd found might not be a man.

A few days later, Lin Fei's true nature was finally exposed. Lin Yimo caught him off guard, bound his hands, and pushed him against the wall. Holding a cat teaser in one hand, he stroked Lin Fei's fluffy ears with the other, narrowed his eyes at those slit pupils, and smiled warmly. "Say meow, and I'll let you go."

Lin Fei: "Meow~ I like it~"

Lin Yimo: ??? Are you actually serious?!

A little scene:

Spring: the season when all things come back to life. At night, the stray cats outside the temple grew restless, their cries rising and falling.

The one inside was no exception.

The next day, Lin Yimo stepped out of his room rubbing his sore lower back. He shook off Lin Fei's hand as it tried to wrap around his waist, then glared at the innocent black cat sitting obediently outside the door.

Black cat: ??

Lin Fei: ...

Under the gaze of two pairs of green eyes, Lin Yimo opened his phone and typed in a few words with a cold expression:

[Cat neutering]

Lin Fei, black cat: !!!!

A Feifei demon who acts like a cool, aloof guy in public but turns into an affectionate kitten in front of his beloved, gong x a true wooden-headed Taoist who seems gentle as jade but is emotionally slow, shou; a longtime bachelor

Set in the world of The Classic of Mountains and Seas. There are tons of original interpretations, and half the talismans and cultivation methods are made up while the other half come from the internet. Don't take them as fact. Trust science.

Upcoming Story Blurbs

"You Call This 4399? [Infinite]":

[Childhood Ruined Warning!]

Qin Guangji, a college student in questionable mental health, had his happy vacation cut short and boarded the train back to school, seething with resentment.

To pass the time, he opened his computer and casually clicked on a familiar-looking mini-game screen.

The train roared through a tunnel, and the lights in the carriage suddenly went out.

When light returned, Qin Guangji found himself in a strange yet familiar world:

White-and-green interfaces, all kinds of icons, and a dazzling array of titles had become towering buildings, rows of stone tablets, and countless gates, all gleaming with a terrifying yet alluring light before his eyes.

While Qin Guangji was still confused, a mechanical child's voice came from above:

[Ding! Welcome to the world of mini-games~]

[All players, please do your best to clear the levels~]

Qin Guangji: ??? Get lost! I play mini-games, not infinite-flow games!!

[Ding! Distributing starting skill~]

As soon as the System's electronic voice fell silent, a familiar object dropped from the sky and landed in front of Qin Guangji.

He picked it up. It was his entrenching tool, which he'd been forced to leave at the station because he couldn't bring it onto the train.

Qin Guangji hoisted the entrenching tool onto his shoulder, grinned viciously, and jabbed the dungeon interface open.

So it's infinite-flow, huh? Let's see whether your dungeon is tougher, or my multifunctional, upgradeable, extra-thick, shovel-hoe-pick combination manganese-steel entrenching tool is tougher!

Not long afterward, the game's new-season rankings opened, and a brand-new name took the top spot.

On the game's internal forum, veteran players were divided over the new dark horse. Some praised him as a god, while others sneered at him.

But they agreed on one thing: if you run into this guy in a dungeon, pray you don't become his enemy. Because a college student having a breakdown is genuinely terrifying!

Dungeon One: Beat Up the Brats

Xiaozi is beating up the brats. Survive!

Qin Guangji: Oh, then I won't survive.

Dungeon Two: Gold Miner

The miner digs for gold. What are you digging for...?

Qin Guangji: Who cares? Dig, dig, dig, dig, dig, dig, dig, dig, all the way to the center of the earth!

Dungeon Three: Forest Fireboy and Watergirl

We're Ice Girl! We're Fire Girl!

Qin Guangji: Excuse me, I'd rather be human.

Dungeon Four: Papa's Burgeria

Welcome to Papa's Burgeria. We are a green restaurant. All ingredients come from Papa's farm, and we don't serve real meat.

Qin Guangji: Why open a restaurant if you don't sell meat? (Flips the stall.)

Dungeon Five: Slime Laboratory

The experiment has entered the testing phase. Test subject: a new type of slime.

Qin Guangji: Ew... Who just flung snot at me?

Dungeon Six: Bad Ice-Cream

In that world, we're all ice cream.

Qin Guangji: Ice cream, great. I'll start with three tubs to fill the gaps in my teeth.

Before You Read:

1. The protagonist has the classic college-student mental state: periodic breakdowns and constant collapse. His motto is basically, as long as I'm not dead, that's fine, and even dying would be fine.

2. The game dungeons have all been heavily modified and only borrow some elements from the original games. They are not faithful adaptations.

3. Mostly silly comedy, with little horror (probably).

4. More dungeons to come. New games will be added later.

5. The author's gaming skills are appallingly bad. Most of the gameplay tips come from the internet, so the author is mostly just talking theory. Corrections are welcome.

6. This is an unhinged work. Anything illogical can be explained by the author being crazy.

7. Didn't expect this. To be added.

"Governing in Two Parts":

[Advance warning: selfcest with the First Emperor, and the love interest is younger]

On the first day after dying at Shaqiu, Qin Shi Huang Ying Zheng became bound to something called a System.

The System said it could help Ying Zheng live again. In exchange, he would have to travel to other worlds and harvest their fortune.

The methods included, but were not limited to, nurturing the chosen one of fortune, becoming the most important person in their heart, and using psychological manipulation to make them willingly hand over their fortune.

Ying Zheng reluctantly agreed.

After the world spun around him, Ying Zheng opened his eyes and saw a familiar scene: shabby houses, chaotic streets, and the carriages and horses of the wealthy passing in the distance, kicking up clouds of yellow dust. Nearby, beggars along the road stretched out their withered hands, pleading for alms.

Ying Zheng recognized the place. This was Handan in Zhao, where he had lived as a child.

At the same time, a wary, childish voice spoke in his mind. "Wh-who are you?"

Ying Zheng's heart jolted. That voice was exactly like his own when he was young!

A little while later, the System spoke: "Beep! Error! BUG detected! Task updated: Host, please do your best to repair the fortune leak, or you will be forcibly sent back."

So, in order to live again, Ying Zheng became the other half of young Ying Zheng's soul.

Every night, under the System's control, he would take over this long-missed body right on schedule, doing his best to improve the fortune of the other him who lived in this shell and make plans for him.

They would be able to separate again only when fortune filled the huge hole caused by the System's error.

The child grew into a teenager, and the teenager became a young man. His fortune gradually recovered, too.

In the fifteenth year of King Zheng of Qin, the realm was at peace, and the six states were on the verge of unification.

King Zheng of Qin became the one and only First Emperor under heaven, with the fortune of ten thousand generations gathered in his hands.

Ying Zheng finally completed the task and earned the reward of living again.

But just as the two souls were about to part, a pair of incredibly familiar hands grabbed the ethereal soul.

At that moment, two identical pairs of eyes met, and sparks flew with astonishing intensity.

"Don't go," the young emperor said, trembling.

Two figures in black imperial robes clung tightly to each other. Twenty-four strands of beads from their ceremonial crowns collided against their foreheads, producing a clear, unsettling chime.

Their lips and teeth entwined.

He kissed the past. He kissed the future.

"Your Majesty... share the realm with me."

King Zheng of Qin gong x First Emperor shou, with the love interest younger.

Parallel-universe setting. This is not a historically rigorous story, and there will definitely be inaccuracies. Apologies in advance, and corrections are welcome.

Theme: Promote traditional folk customs