The Sword-Bearers' Handbook for Raising Kids

[Slice of Life, as the title says: raising little kids with swords. Kết Y may have a pairing. Lots and lots of headcanons. I scrapped and rewrote the old version. Updates are leisurely, no false promises.]

[Read at your own risk, everyone!]

Ever since Konnosuke smuggled a human baby back from another world, the Honmaru, once the strongest and now a retirement home, has finally come back to life.

Even more heartening, the most famously lazy sword has taken the initiative to get a job at the mapo tofu restaurant run by a priest.

But while they were busy developing their new side businesses, they also noticed an ominous sign. Their little girl had actually begged Shokudaikiri to teach her how to make chocolate the day before Valentine's Day?!

And when they asked who it was for, she blushed?!

Was it little Rikusei, who had always called her his little sister? Or little Tsuyoshi from the Saitama household next door?

But if it was little Hina from the mountain behind them, or little JoJo from the Kujo family, or even the other little Hina who kept trying to lure little Kết Y home with caviar, they needn't worry too much. After all, they're all girls.

But on Valentine's Day, when the swords secretly investigated, they discovered none of the people listed above had received the chocolate. So what had gone wrong?

Or had a new little piglet appeared?!

The Forge God, Ichimokuren, helplessly accepted the chocolate little Kết Y handed him. "I've heard your wish!"

The next day, for the first time since taking office, little Kết Y got a perfect result on her first attempt, forging the Caliburn, a collaboration between Chaldea and the Time Government.

Happily dragging the Caliburn off to find the swords, she discovered they were all suited up and ready to leave. When she asked where they were going, all they said was, "We're going to spar with Lord Gilgamesh."

Thesis: May every child have a wonderful childhood.