Having My Sincere Feelings Toyed With by an Honest Woman

"Sincerely looking for a same-sex partner to spend my life with."

Chen Ayu had never met a lesbian before and had no idea where to find one, so she paid to place a personal ad seeking a same-sex partner in a magazine.

Her inbox filled with messages.

Most were sent just to stir things up, and a few were outright abusive.

Only one was different.

The writer's words were earnest and sincere. They said nothing inappropriate, only that they wanted to get to know her.

Chen Ayu had never met a lesbian before and had no idea how to talk to one, so she didn't reply right away.

She decided to wait and see.

Even though she didn't answer, that person wrote to her almost every day.

Through those letters, she could almost picture the person on the other end as "honest and dependable." Gradually, she fell for the writer.

An orphan who had grown up alone, she was thirty years old, with no one to rely on, and desperately longed for a family.

Summoning her courage, she invited the writer to meet. "I think you might be my type... If you can, please come to the address in my letter... Sorry to bother you."

The other person replied.

She made an effort to get dressed up, then headed to the meeting place with her heart pounding.

But she waited until dark, and the person she was waiting for never showed. Maybe they had come, seen her, and walked away disappointed...

She returned home feeling dejected and carried on with her life.

Perhaps she'd never have a relationship in this lifetime. Perhaps she'd really grow old alone.

Just as she was thinking this, a beautiful girl burst into her barren life.

"Big sis, you're so wonderful. How have you never been in a relationship?"

"Why do you always say you're no good? You look so cute. I really like you."

"If you're afraid of being alone, why not say yes to me? I mean... for the rest of our lives, of course."

Chen Ayu had never been in love before, and the girl's sweet talk soon left her completely head over heels. She gave the girl everything and swore she'd treat her well for the rest of her life.

They spent one sweet summer together. It was like a dream.

When the girl was about to leave for school, Chen Ayu offered to see her off.

"No need," the girl said with a smile.

The smile, along with the girl's recent attitude toward her, gave Chen Ayu a sense that something was wrong, but she didn't dare ask.

Later, when she tried messaging the girl again, she discovered she'd been blocked...

Summoning her courage, she went to the university the girl attended.

By luck, she happened to see the girl coming out with her roommates, all smiles, to buy something.

The girl was still as beautiful as ever, surrounded by people just as young and radiant as she was.

Chen Ayu looked at the stone sign bearing the university's name. They were from completely different worlds.

She went home feeling dejected, cried her heart out, and accepted reality.

Half a month later, a woman pursued her.

Longing for the security of a stable home, Chen Ayu soon agreed to be with her.

*

She saw a personal ad in a magazine: "Sincerely looking for a same-sex partner to spend my life with."

The magazine was passed around among her classmates, who mocked it without restraint.

"Oh my God, people still do something this old-fashioned? Looking for love in a magazine!"

"Hey, let's message her and see if she'll reply."

"If you want to, do it yourself. What if she latches on to you?"

"What are you afraid of? It's not like she can crawl through the signal and get to us. It's online, so we can mess around all we want."

The group sent messages to the woman as a joke.

They deceived her and made fun of her...

Betting on who would get a reply.

Lu Tian, bored as ever, joined in this cruel game of teasing.

Using the email address in the magazine, she wrote a confession, made up a story about already having a job, and crafted herself an impressive persona before sending it off.

She waited a long time, but there was no reply.

High school was stressful, and she was bored anyway, so she treated the inbox as a way to pass the time, often sending messages full of made-up details and things her fictional persona would say.

She was beginning to think no one ever checked the inbox when, one day, she got a reply.

"I think you might be my type... If you can, please come to the address in my letter... Sorry to bother you."

The warmth, affection, and shyness in the letter seemed to shine through the words themselves.

Amused, she posted the letter in the group chat and mocked the writer:

"The lesbian replied to me."

"That confession is so gross. Keep talking to her and see what else this lesbian says."

With her classmates eager to see what happened next, Lu Tian took the next step.

Wanting to find out what a real-life lesbian looked like, and hoping to take the joke further, she went to the meeting.

Hidden in the crowd, she saw the woman's appearance and was sorely disappointed. She was nothing like the glamorous lesbian she'd imagined from their online exchanges.

Her face was pretty, but her manner seemed dull and slow-witted.

She looked completely dazed.

There was no challenge in teasing someone like her.

Lu Tian left, thoroughly uninterested, and stayed out late having fun before remembering the woman.

As if compelled by some inexplicable force, she went back. The woman was still waiting.

...Could anyone really be this foolish?

Amazed that anyone like this still existed in this day and age, Lu Tian used the email address to find out where the woman worked.

She watched her, and watched her, until she started dating her.

The woman's life was so barren that it took only a little sweet talk to win her over. Lu Tian barely had to make an effort.

"Lu Tian, you're really dating a woman? Oh my God, the whole lesbian thing... Doesn't it gross you out?"

"It's just for fun. I'm not taking it seriously. Dating a woman... Even sleeping with one isn't a big deal, is it?"

After all, it was only a way to pass the time.

She toyed with the woman's body and feelings, laughing as she watched her give everything for Lu Tian, then told her classmates how ridiculous the woman was.

"Look at her. She's such an idiot."

When the date for the start of university arrived, the brief diversion came to an end.

"I'm leaving." She abandoned the woman without hesitation.

But afterward, no matter what she did, something felt wrong. She felt empty.

Trying to shake off her strange feelings, she went back to the woman, only to discover that the woman who had said she loved her was already with someone else.

It had only been half a month...

The person she'd treated as a way to pass the time had treated her the same way...

Chen Ayu, with all your talk of love, you're disgusting.

"Those who treat another person's sincere love as a pastime will one day become someone else's pastime."

Flavor: She's so starved for affection that she'll fall for anyone who treats her well. Looking for a way out! Urgent!

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