[The King's Avatar] The Freebie Simulator

The author is a crossover shipper. The main text is full of abstract humor and terrible memes, with occasional bouts of poetic angst. The main text has officially switched to third-person narration. This is an original female protagonist fic, so go away, toxic shippers.

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First, this is a Life Restart Simulator. We are not dating. Second, this is not a galgame. We are not dating. Finally, Dice Goddess, could you stop setting me up and making everyone give themselves away for free?

"So what do you mean, Huang Shaotian starts with 89 affection, and Yu Wenzhou with 94?!"

"Wait, Lin Jingyan, why are you at 97 already? And Ye Xiu, how did you show up at 98??"

"...Glory Goddess, why did you give yourself away for free too? (horrified face)"

"Are there even any humans left here?"

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Current status:

Run One is complete.

Even with a ranged talent of 32, you still have the heart of a ranged player. You won't give up researching ranged combat for melee players. Includes faux-incest and lots of people giving themselves away for free. Could you all stop giving yourselves away for free? This is a trial run, and the ending was rushed. I'll restart this run later.

Run Two: coming soon.

Let's be magical girls and spread friendship and bonds! Yes, you have to be a magical girl too. But there are lots of jokes about Chinese-style education. There'll probably be a Magical Girl Team 82 and Magical Girl Jessica. The dice keep making people give themselves away for free.

Run Three: coming later.

Our teacher said we should be upright and proper, so you became a crossover shipper. Doesn't "main team" mean the team you ship the most? There's no way you're not going to ship people. You've got to make a living by shipping everyone with everyone! There's no way you can stop shipping; you can only survive by being a crossover shipper! That's why they call you the Great Shipster... Things are heating up. I got carried away writing crossover-shipper forum posts in Run Two, and couldn't resist adding this to the list of runs. I'll be drawing on some of the setup from my own fic, The Alliance's Number One Shipster (in my short story collection), so it's normal if it feels familiar.

Run Four: coming later.

"I know you're foolish, frivolous, and thoughtless, but I love you. I know your goals and ideals are vulgar and ordinary, but I love you. I know you're second-rate, but I love you..." Everyone will fall in love with you, no matter what side of yourself you show them. Some people may fall in love with only one side of someone else, but that's not how it is with you. They love you, all of you, every part of you. So they want all of you, too. In Season 9, Team Excellent Era doesn't compete in the Challenger League. They stay in the Alliance and win the championship, but Excellent Era still disbands after Season 9. This is a Tomie-type AU.

Run Five: currently updating.

A restart of Run One, but with the Umbrella-Shura-Cheng sharing-a-rental setup, plus some jealousy-fueled dumpling-making scenes.

I haven't figured out the later runs yet.

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Thanks to my friends for providing the cheeky remarks in the [] sections before the main text.

The original title was Life Restart Simulator, but there were too many people giving themselves away for free, so I changed it.

I'm no graphic designer, so the edited image is extremely crude TT

Detective Xia is fan art drawn by a kind teacher. Adorable!

Inspired by the game of the same name from a few years ago. Semi-Anko, with only some dice rolls shown. The main text is in third person. OOC, OOC, OOC! The protagonist will be very powerful. If you're uncomfortable with comparing the protagonist to characters from the original work, click the top-left corner to leave.

All the men who appear in this story are straight, but the women aren't necessarily straight.

The cover images are all newly commissioned Xia art ww, and I've bought the commercial rights to all of them.

I won't break up characters who are in relationships or have someone they're clearly interested in. Their affection levels default to CB. For example, Fang Minghua and Du Ming, but Tang Rou will have an affection roll.

As always, toxic shippers, go away.

Theme: Anything goes.