Strange Retrieval: From the Start, a Vengeful Ghost Becomes a Doorknob

[Delusion-Inducing Protagonist + Cthulhu + Business Management + Comedy + A World Where Only the Victims Get Hurt]

Chen Pi was sick, seriously sick.

Other people got an invincible System as their golden finger. His golden finger was having his body randomly mutate every day.

He woke up in the morning to find his left hand had turned into a roaring chainsaw of flesh and blood. He could only cover the noise with heavy metal rock.

He took an afternoon nap, and his legs turned into perpetual-motion springs. He was forced to dance through a 996 office building, stomping the capitalists' rules to pieces.

He sneezed, and his spine turned into a 5G base station, sending a surge through the internet that melted the algorithm demon's brain into mush…

To suppress his body's rampage, Chen Pi was forced to run an “Abnormal Recycling Shop,” scouring the world for indescribable, uncanny junk to treat his illness.

…

But in the eyes of Special Operations Bureau agents and the rest of the world, things looked like this:

“He wielded a killing machine and physically exorcised an entire van of vengeful ghosts. That was an act of mercy toward the dead!”

“He defied causality and stuffed an ancient god into a toilet plunger. That was a show of contempt for divine authority!”

“He is a walking god among men, the ultimate containment force for chaos and order!”

As his believers worshipped him like mad, Chen Pi stood trembling in the collapsing world, wearing sunglasses (because his eyes had turned into laser pointers), and said:

“Stop hyping me up! I really just want to get some materials to treat my illness!!”

“Hey, ancient god, don't run! Lend me your thigh bone so I can get a prosthetic!”