Master, Please Let Me Finish My Excuses

A tribulation lightning strike during ascension swaps the souls of Lin Xiaoxiao, a modern-day top relationship influencer, and Ling Shuang Sword Venerable, the ruthless founder of the Xuantian Sect in the cultivation world.

The cultivation world is thrown into chaos.

With an army of demonic cultivators bearing down on them, Lin Xiaoxiao, in Ling Shuang Sword Venerable's body, clears her throat and sets up a sound-amplifying formation at the front lines. “Soldiers on the other side, I know you're in a hurry, but please don't panic! Let's put our differences aside and take a deep dive into your emotional wounds and what you're really asking for...”

A sword strike roars toward her. She dodges nimbly and cries out in dismay, “See? This is a textbook case of an attack driven by emotional release! Fellow cultivator, you're very aggressive, but deep down, you must be terribly lonely, right?”

Every demonic overlord and immortal venerable present freezes in a daze.

Meanwhile, in a livestream room somewhere on Earth...

Ling Shuang Sword Venerable, in Lin Xiaoxiao's body, watches the screen with an icy expression as a caller tearfully complains that their cultivation partner ran off with someone else.

He falls silent for three seconds, then says coldly, “Your Dao heart is unstable. Just cut them down. Send me the coordinates. I, this venerable... I mean, I'll go help you clean house right now.”

The livestream room erupts. The top donor sends a barrage of rockets: “Streamer! My cultivation partner hasn't run off, but my boss is a monster! I sent you the coordinates. Please fly your sword past his office window a couple of times!”

Ling Shuang Sword Venerable: “...”

Once the two finally find a way to communicate, Lin Xiaoxiao's jade slip receives a deadly question from another world every day:

“Someone slanders me, bullies me, and humiliates me. Which article of the Criminal Law do I use to deal with them? Need an answer ASAP.”