The Jungle Big Shot Who Spoke at the Flag-Raising Ceremony

At Number One High, the “perfect student” has to check three boxes: top grades, piano, and a speech under the flag.

Lin Xian and Jiang Yan turn the three boxes into performance art:

They hide earbuds under their qipaos and BP signals in their speeches. Their piano pedals are synced to sniper rhythms. That 697 score is just a bonus.

They eat grilled skewers, climb over walls, and play esports, making every “perfect kid” image collapse.

When drone patrols, public opinion trials, and the threat of suspension all come for them at once, the five of them strike back by founding the “Fake Good Kids Alliance”:

- Use functions to calculate the angle for scaling a wall, with a margin of error of 1 cm

- Turn used cooking oil into scholarships, donating tens of thousands a month

- Give their grilled skewer shop a Pre-A valuation of 50 million

- Turn a gap year into The Rebel’s Handbook, selling out 100,000 copies

When the college entrance exam results come out, Tsinghua’s admissions team camps outside their door all night. Lin Xian submits a gap-year application: “Come back in a year. I’ll enroll with a chain of grilled skewer shops and a national championship trophy.”

Jiang Yan brings his piano concerto to the bell-ringing ceremony for a company going public. “Going public counts as bringing glory to the family, too.”

Beneath the flag, they stand shoulder to shoulder for the last time, tear the word “obedient” to shreds, and scatter it into the 37-degree morning breeze.

Good kids? No. We’re going to be the bosses of our own lives.