The First Lady General

There's a saying in the Qin capital: “Don't marry a Ye daughter, and if you're marrying your daughter off, choose a Wen son.” The Ye women are the notorious tyrants of the capital. From court officials and palace women to chicken-market thugs, everyone turns pale and trembles at the mere mention of them. The Wen sons, on the other hand, are universally praised throughout the capital. At seventeen, he won the top honors in the imperial examinations; at nineteen, he was already a fourth-rank Deputy Minister of Works. Talented and refined, gentle as jade, he was the ideal son-in-law. Unfortunately, the Wen son was noticed by a Ye daughter. Just as it seemed she was about to abduct a man and force him into marriage, and he was about to fall into her clutches, the Ye daughter suddenly left for another land. From then on, the people of the capital enjoyed a peaceful and harmonious life... Ye Ling, a woman who transmigrated, firmly follows the wise maxim, “Youth is wasted if you're not chuuni.” She barrels down the road of chuunibyou, crashing headfirst into a wall and proving with blood and tears that she's nothing more than an ordinary woman who transmigrated. Then, at last, she awakens and becomes a rising star. Three years later, Ye Ling returns to the capital. After experiencing one scheme after another like a perfectly normal person, Miss Ye sighs: “Being chuuni really is the best!” And so Miss Ye's chuunibyou flares up again. She burns, kills, robs, and loots, bullying men and dominating women, tyrannizing the market and the state. She swears to keep her chuunibyou going to the very end! In a nutshell: The story of a chuuni young woman who makes a name for herself far and wide, builds a career, and takes a handsome man and a devoted guard-dog husband for herself along the way. Highlights: The chuuni girl's pursuit of love: “Little Wen, I'm here, here, heeere!” With a head of cabbage in each hand, the Ye daughter “runs” toward the Wen son in an absurdly slow-motion movie scene. Dropping to one knee, she gazes at him with hearts in her eyes and declares in the most grandiose recitative, “Little Wen, I wish you were a cabbage in my hands, so I could hold you close to my heart and eat you up. Then you would be inside me, and I inside you, and we'd never be apart again~” The Wen son covers his face and flees. The chuuni girl's wedding: The master of ceremonies calls, “The bride and groom, please enter the hall!” “Cluck cluck...” “Coo coo...” The maid of honor glances at the red-crowned rooster and covers her face in relief. The young lady really knows how to save face. She caught a hen to stand in for the bride, so it and the rooster make a proper pair! The chuuni girl's palace intrigue: “Oh? Is there anything tastier than food from the imperial kitchen? Do tell. I'd love to know,” a favored consort asks sweetly. “Sweet potatoes,” the Ye girl replies with an innocent smile. “After three days and two nights without food, sweet potatoes stolen from the enemy's supply camp taste the best. Of course, Your Highness must think sweet potatoes are peasant food. But without us ‘peasants,’ would Your Highness enjoy such fine clothes and food today?” The chuuni girl's battlefield speech: “Soldiers! The enemy has killed our countrymen, stolen our beauties, seized our cities, plundered our granaries, and occupied our land. What should we...” The Ye girl rehearses her speech. A strategist beside her quietly corrects her: “General, you should say they've stolen your Wen son...” The Ye girl immediately abandons her speech and says, “Stolen your Wen son? I didn't know my most capable assistant was into that! There are hundreds of soldiers in this camp... Could you be the legendary ‘eternal chrysanthemum’?” P.S. There are handsome men and devoted guard dogs, with one couple only.