[Western Crossover] The Three of Us

When Night Owl was ten, he found an alien spaceship in Gotham Bay. He pried it open and found an alien inside, just old enough to crawl.

To be honest, Night Owl didn't want an alien. He only wanted the spaceship.

The outsiders disagreed. "Young master, the house is so quiet. You should keep a living creature. Besides, in movies, aliens that can't adapt to life on Earth usually die pretty quickly."

Ten-year-old Night Owl figured he had nothing better to do, and Wayne Manor could afford to keep an alien. The alien didn't die. The longer he raised it, the more lively it became.

When the alien grew up, he asked Night Owl, "Daddy, why can't I come to your party?"

When Ultraman first arrived on Earth, he wasn't quite a newborn. His intelligence was roughly that of an eight- or nine-year-old human. He knew exactly who he was, where he came from, and what he was doing on Earth. He had planned to find a couple to adopt him and give him an Earth identity, then kill them once he grew up. But the people he met weren't a couple. They were an expressionless boy and a butler behind him with a distinctly malicious look.

Plans had changed. The heir to a wealthy family seemed like a better identity, so Ultraman pretended to be a baby and moved into Wayne Manor.

You think you deserve to be my dad? I'll never call you Daddy. I'll kill you all when I grow up. Humans are weird, and Thomas is even weirder. For Krypton's sake, I suppose you can count as my friend. Why didn't you invite me to your party? We've lived together for so long and have never been apart.

Superwoman worked with Ultraman purely for mutual benefit. When she joined the Syndicate, Night Owl, standing off to the side, caught her attention. An interesting adult, far more interesting than an alien boy like Ultraman. She'd heard that Night Owl was Ultraman's guardian, but so what? They weren't related by blood. She wanted both his super strength and his super intelligence.

Ultraman glared at her. "Superwoman, how dare you steal my Night Owl!"

Superwoman toyed with the Lasso of Submission in her hand. "Kal, stop bothering Thomas and me. Go find somewhere else to be."

Night Owl said expressionlessly, "Superwoman, there's nothing between Ultraman and me."

Before-reading note:

A love triangle among Earth-3's Wonder Woman, Batman, and Superman. They really do get physical with one another, and none of them is any good. Their thought processes are bizarre. They hold meetings during the day and fight at night, then go back to meetings the next day. Might as well make the best of it. What else can they do, get divorced?

Theme: Young people's lives are full of variety