I Flopped as the Protagonist in Three Books

The Transmigration Into a Book Bureau is short-staffed, so Su Fu gets assigned a mission: play the protagonist of three books in the same world.

They are:

The first disciple of an all-powerful immortal master in a cultivation-leveling story, a commanding figure with the world at his fingertips.

A tortured substitute bottom in a Green River novel, whose scumbag top will face a groveling redemption arc later.

A delicate bottom with a peerless furnace constitution in an explicit story, who falls with a single push.

Su Fu travels between worlds and never makes a mistake, until one day a System malfunction mixes up the character settings for all three missions. And so...

In the Green River novel, the master he'd secretly loved for so long sits above him and says coldly, "I've been raising you all this time just to use your blood to cure Yao'er."

Su Fu smiles faintly, displaying all the poise of a first disciple. "You old bastard! If you want my blood, beat me first!"

Before long, Su Fu has defeated everyone under heaven and become the strongest in the sect. He bundles up the protagonist top and his first love and kicks them out of the sect.

/

In the cultivation-leveling story, the Great Dao of the mentor who taught Su Fu is on the verge of completion. The day before ascending, he comes to say goodbye.

Su Fu kneels before his mentor, cheeks flushed, lost in the fantasy that he's a delicate bottom. "Master (rustling as he takes off his clothes), would you cultivate duality with your disciple (his sash falls to the ground)?"

Mentor: ...Get out.

That very day, his mentor announces that Su Fu has been expelled from the sect.

/

In the explicit story, the protagonist top, who has coveted Su Fu for ages, corners him. His eyes are bloodshot, and he looks ready to pounce.

Su Fu clutches his collar protectively and is about to speak when his master arrives, tearing through the void, ready to win his disciple back. Watching the scene, he gently dusts his robes and asks softly, "My disciple, are you two going to cultivate duality too?"

Su Fu: ?!

Su Fu: What on earth went wrong (o_O)

/

"You're telling me that the foolish, love-struck guy who took on a hundred people single-handedly overnight, the first disciple of the famous immortal master in the cultivation world, and Su Fu, who gets stars in his eyes whenever he sees a man, are all the same person?!!!"

Su Fu: Uh, actually, my mother gave birth to triplets.

Nobody believes him.

Theme: Take everything seriously.