The Aloof Straight Man Gets Bound to a System [Quick Transmigration]

Blurb:

Wan Lü is upright, aloof, and a workaholic. On an utterly ordinary day, he gets bound to a System that speaks in a mouthful of censored words.

From the uncensored information, he learns that the System comes from Huashi. He has to play the role of a top, win over all the protagonists, and achieve a hundred-man conquest before he can go home.

Wan Lü: Thanks, but no thanks. I'm straight, and I don't do sexy stuff.

.

World One: His Aloof Self

[Your wife's betrayal, your boss's contempt, your friend's provocation. In this life, reclaim everything that belongs to you with your big! Make them all bow down and submit!] The System speaks in high spirits.

Wan Lü: Please use civilized language.

Wan Lü has no intention of doing the tasks and simply goes to work and comes home as usual. But his wife, who wasn't interested in him in the original story, keeps trying every way she can to seduce him.

With his white shirt soaked and clinging to him, the man sneezes, the corners of his eyes red, and takes Wan Lü's hand. "A-Lü, feel my forehead. Do you think I have a fever?"

Wan Lü, his palm forced against the man's stomach: ?

[He really does have a fever. Even his is getting hard. Don't chicken out, Host, go for it!] The System cheers him on.

Wan Lü ignores the System's commentary, pulls his hand away, takes a piece of clothing from the wardrobe, and drapes it over him. "Don't catch a chill."

His wife, bundled up like a penguin in the middle of summer: ...

I hate that you're such a block of wood!

Lately, his friend has been inviting him to dinner for no reason, taking him to watch movies about love between brothers, then asking what he thought.

[Looks like your bro is into you... Heh heh~] The System lets out a sly laugh. [Best buds~]

Wan Lü frowns slightly and sends his friend a serious message.

[The hand-holding scene at the end was unnecessary. The movie's one flaw.]

His friend: …

I hate that you're such a block of wood!

After getting drunk, his boss insists on staying at his place. As a subordinate, Wan Lü can't refuse.

But his boss is afraid of heat, darkness, and thunder, and wants to crawl into his arms...

[On a stormy night, the way to banish fear is to~]

Wan Lü presses his lips together, opens a nursery-rhyme playlist on his phone, and asks, "Are you still scared?"

His boss: ...

Who turned on the purification?

World Two: His Face-Blind Self

[As one of the face-blind F3 at an aristocratic academy, you pursued a poor student on a whim. But you never expected your best buddies to be such jerks: they take advantage of your condition to make you part of their little game, openly kissing and cuddling your boyfriend right in front of you! This time, give them a taste of their own medicine. Pretend you don't recognize them and make them cry and beg you!] The System is fired up.

Wan Lü isn't interested. He's immersed in the joy of doing practice problems every day, never imagining that the group would exploit his face blindness to play a game of "Guess Who I Am?"

Wan Lü looks at the few mosaicked figures on his phone and feels like his eyes are about to go blind. How did the story end up taking such a shameless turn?

Reader's Guide:

1. The top is split into multiple versions of himself. Both body and mind are pure.

2. The bottom is aloof and basically always wears a poker face. He avoids the tasks, but the plot keeps descending on him in all sorts of unexpected ways.

3. This story includes shameless tactics like "You wouldn't want..." and "Please, let me take a look..."

4. Kinks.

5. The System is an old hand, with a mouthful of censored words. You deserve to have it.

Theme: Stay true to yourself.