Chinese-Style Urban Legends, Divine Cheats

[The author is terrible at naming things, so the title may change later. The blurb is in first person, but the story itself is in third person.

CP: Nezha. The Great Sage is just here to have fun and watch the drama unfold.]

After the Age of Ten Thousand Spirits, the barriers between the Three Realms broke.

From then on, countless myths, Chinese horror stories, and urban legends circulating on the human internet became real, hidden in the shadows.

But when I joined a company called the Myth and Urban Legend Containment Agency, I never thought the recruiting ad's claim that it had "the richest and most realistic atmosphere of the supernatural and fantastical" would actually be true.

Because all my coworkers came from the Ninth Heaven, the underworld, and the Classic of Mountains and Seas. They were all sorts of gods, demons, and monsters.

Thinking back to my first day at the company, Taotie from the neighboring department told me I looked delicious. I suspected he meant it in the most literal sense.

This is too dangerous. As a human, I decided to quit.

But my resignation was rejected.

Because the contract stated, "You may die on the job, but you may not quit."

Damn it, I'd been blinded by the salary and benefits and missed that clause.

I slapped the table and cried, "Who wrote this employment contract?! What an idiot..."

Human Resources Director Bai Ze: "The Judicial God, True Lord Yang Jian."

I calmly sat back down. "...A visionary with a masterful grasp of the big picture."

With no other choice, to keep my life [gong] and salary [zi], I could only apply for a transfer to field operations. I also drew a Divine Blessing blind box while I was at it.

They said it would bind field personnel to a high-ranking god from the divine realm, giving them a god's personal protection throughout their long monster-hunting career.

But I never expected to draw two at once, and both were embodiments of "Red Lotus Incarnation" and "Great Sage Equal to Heaven," symbols of the very pinnacle of divine power.

I figured my monster-hunting, money-making career was going to be a sure thing. I'd be able to stroll through all kinds of Chinese horror worlds without a care.

After all, making ghosts and monsters feel terrified is a kind of terror too [smile]

[Blurb written on August 11, 2023. Screenshot posted on Weibo.]

Theme: Live positively and work hard to make a fortune