The Extreme Monk, Ascending Through Physical Force [Journey to the West]

At their first meeting, Tang Sanzang threatened his four disciples with a weapon. “When I was little, I had my big brother tell my fortune. He said I was destined to be the kind of man who succeeds at the cost of ten thousand lives. As it happens, I’m still exactly four short.

“I’ll give you four one last chance to think it over. Are you going to join me or not?”

Jiang Liuer came from the river, with neither father nor mother.

He had a pocket dimension filled with endless knowledge, which taught him to forge guns with his bare hands and make nuclear weapons from scratch.

So he resolved from childhood to become everybody’s big brother.

An old monk took him in as a disciple. By day, he ate meals provided by the locals. By night, he shouldered his weapons and guarded the area. Without his permission, not even a mosquito could get into the temple.

He became famous, known as Big Brother Golden Cicada.

The monks and common folk praised him as they passed, calling him a Buddha of boundless wisdom who saved all living beings.

He became too famous and was summoned to the capital. Later, he became sworn brothers with the emperor and was given the name Tang Sanzang.

Tang Sanzang set off to fetch the scriptures, riding a tall horse, an AK-417 slung over his shoulder, proclaiming the Buddha's mercy as he went, with firepower to spare, all the way west.

He also took on four disciples.

Each of the four had their own agenda. He didn't care, focused as he was on his grand plan for scientific development.

And development required resources.

“Oh, you can cultivate immortality? Great! Cultivators can turn stone into gold and live carefree forever.”

“Say, do you know how to mine?”

“You're afraid to dig because the mountain isn't yours?”

“No problem, I'll make a quick trip. It soon will be.”

“If you handle the immortals and I take care of the mortal world, what can't we conquer together?”

A monk sent by the Tang Empire to fetch the scriptures? (No.)

A great general sent by the Tang Empire to conquer the west! (Yes.)

July 14, 2023

Theme: Love and peace