Dreaming Mayfly

I really like this book, or in other words, I really like the tenacious Lin Jinci and Fu Yipei who firmly likes Lin Jinci. People are products of family and environment. It is precisely because of Xiaoci's twisted family that her background is lonely and closed. Her mother is prejudiced against her, her father is indifferent, her aunt is obsessed with money, and her cousin has evil intentions. Looking at it this way, there is no one who truly cares for her among the people who are always by her side. Xiaoci was just a child when her brother had a car accident, her mind was not yet mature, and she was faced with the loss of a life. She needed care. However, Xia Rong placed all the responsibility on her, regardless of the truth of the matter, because she was biased against Xiao Ci from beginning to end. So from the death in a car accident, to the early love affair in high school, to studying abroad, they only remembered the negative news about Xiaoci and what they thought were the negative impacts, but ignored the reality. Because, they no longer have love for Lin Jinci, only dissatisfaction and desire to control her. And what about Xiaoci? There is no one around to rely on, not even a place to stay. At home, you have to endure the malice of your parents, and at your aunt's house, you have to be wary of your cousin's intrusion. Intimacy brought her nothing but endless pain and self-doubt. To protect herself, she puts up walls and becomes emotionally indifferent. Try to do everything yourself, refuse to be soft to others, or even dare to admit your love and need for love, because it will symbolize your weakness and may also become a weapon for others to attack you. So she built a mechanism to protect herself: "She understood a long time ago that as long as she is softer and more plastic, exposes the festering wounds, imitates others crying in pain, and sheds some tears at the right time, she may get something called "love". It's too much trouble. If the love that everyone pursues is such a weak thing. Then she doesn't want it. " She has always done a good job of giving up those relationships that made her tired, except when she faced Fu Yipei. Fu Yipei is really good, but family disputes make it impossible for her to face his family calmly. So she chose to escape, swallowing and hiding "that part of life that cannot be explained in two hours." Because it was the humidity that lingered in her life. I watched her go through the pain of her family and the hesitation of youth alone, and I suddenly wanted to hug her. Tell her that you are fine. It is not your fault that your brother had a car accident. It is not your fault that you were mistaken for puppy love. It is not your fault that you want to eat meat. It is also not your fault that you plan to study abroad. It is they who have been emotionally kidnapping you. On the other hand, I admire her very much, maybe she doesn't need my hug. She has her own soul that has endured such pain in life, has her own goals and abilities, and is a thick and soft person. There is a sentence in the article that I like very much, it is called, "The first heartbeat of youth is to discover an island that is difficult to visit." If Xiaoci is the island that is difficult to visit and the unbearable iceberg on the water, then Fu Yipei is the mortal who was shocked by the wonder and developed love and desire to get close. From the silent attention in high school to the approach in the name of eating in the cafeteria in college, Fu Yipei always appears suddenly like the rain in spring and summer, and is unnoticed. By the time you sense him, he is already very close to you. This man seems to have skipped the stage where boys in adolescence are disgusted by others. He is so delicate in his dealings with others, as if he can withstand all indifference and dissatisfaction. But when Lin Jinci faced such a flawless, spotless and perfect person, her thoughts were filled with disgust and fear. "She suddenly thought—— Is there a little fish in this world who was thrown ashore as soon as he was born, survived strangely, and has been afraid of the sea ever since? The first person to give Lin Jinci such a strong sense of fear was Fu Yipei. " In fact, in a sense, being hated by Xiao Ci doesn't mean that he is actually an extremely special person in Xiao Ci's heart. When two people with wonderful personalities met, a different spark sparked. There are many special and strange things between them, such as meeting in the men's bathhouse in high school, the coincidence of watching a movie together in college, and the misunderstanding of "rescuing" a cousin after returning to China. , Destiny is really a wonderful thing. It does not want smooth sailing, but twists and turns. But perhaps emotionally, this is the shortest way for them to take. Under the influence and influence of her grandmother and aunt, and staying away from the people and things that consumed her energy, Xiaoci finally had the energy to fall in love. She is not really a stone-hearted person, but she can also feel Fu Yipei's care for her. So, she decided to give her heart to find love and receive love. I feel like crying when I write this. Xiaoci is such a good person, but he is so tortured that he feels hollow. Fortunately, Fu Yipei is there. He was her respite and reward in her busy life, and he was the rare person she could rely on with peace of mind. Hey, let's not talk anymore, please continue to be happy as a couple!

I like reading paper books. I originally wanted to buy a physical book, but my best friend always recommended me to read it. She said that I would definitely like Lin Jinci. After reading it, I really like her. Let me talk about the overall feeling first: The main plot of this book is not complicated - secret love, breakup, reunion, reconciliation. The plot line seems to be weak? But when a character is written realistic enough, the plot doesn't seem to be that important. Teacher Lu is, as always, good at depicting the inner world and emotional entanglements of the characters, with delicate brushstrokes. Before the end of the campus narration, I felt sour in my heart. The writing has a sour and tender texture, just like the title of the book Dreaming of Mayflies - "A mayfly lives and dies, but persists in chasing the moonlight." I saw some comments saying that the narrative was confusing, but I don't know why I didn't feel this way. Just like Xiaoci described -1p as being like a movie, reading this book also feels like watching a movie, and those transitions naturally have corresponding images in my mind. Xiaoci reminds me of Tara in "You Are Like a Bird Flying to Your Mountain". They are both girls who were pushed to the edge by their original families. The harsh situation made her learn early not to feel sorry for herself or complain when encountering problems, and to be independent and independent in pursuing her goals. The hurt and neglect of the people closest to her made Xiaoci learn to wrap herself up at a young age, hiding all her joys, anger, sorrows and joys, so that she would not feel or touch them. This kind of feeling is similar to the lake that freezes due to cold in winter. Her calm state was her way of protecting herself, so when she met Fu Yipei, who was as warm as the spring sun, she had waves. At first, she stayed away, but then she melted away willingly. Who would be willing to reject such a sincere and measured sincerity? It is difficult for many articles on this subject to avoid being unconventional, such as writing about "redemption" and "being redeemed", but the author does not. Xiaoci has never been a passive person waiting for rescue. What she has been doing is "self-rescue". She has learned to lower her expectations due to the unwarranted contempt and malice of her parents. After the death of her younger brother, her family's subtle mental violence, transfer turmoil, and harassment at her aunt's house, etc., She also dealt with it in her own way, and always followed her own ideas and followed the path she wanted to take. I think the most touching thing about Xiaoci is "No self-pity, no reconciliation, but I want to save myself." Until the end, she was still cool and cool, still not good at words, and still had her own charm, but she just learned to allow someone to get close to her. You can feel the author's care in shaping the heroine's character. This kind of "imperfect but powerful" female character is much more precious than a heroine with a perfect personality. As for the male and female protagonists, the male protagonist really fits the world of Mary Sue. He is so perfect that it is outrageous. His deep affection is not built up by gorgeous words, but by details one after another - "He looked at her as if he were looking at a mountain that could not be climbed, but he was willing to be covered with fallen leaves in the distance." This character. My overall impression is that of gentleness and restraint, forbearance and affection, but also a measure of progress and retreat. Xiao Ci is the only one who never presses questions that Xiao Ci does not want to answer directly. He respects all Xiao Ci's wishes and understands Xiao Ci. It seems to be easy for him, even though they are two very different people. For Xiaoci, it is just like the author's description: "-1p is the satin and flowers falling towards Xiaoci, and the blade will be at a loss." So the dislike at the beginning is actually at a loss, corresponding to the opening chapter "Will there be a little fish in this world that was thrown ashore as soon as it was born, survived strangely, and has been afraid of the sea ever since." Fu Yipei is the sea that Xiaoci fears, and her instinct tells her not to get close. The part that poked me the most was when the drunk heroine took a long, long time to utter three words: Hug me. Fu Yipei paused, and suddenly felt a void in his heart. I also paused, feeling suddenly free in my heart. I was so sad that I almost wanted to cry. I also really wanted to hug Xiaoci. Personally, I feel that the plot with the most emotional tension is the male-female scene written by the author. Unfortunately, I seem to have missed the full version. I can only smell the exhaust. This section is simply the climax of the emotional description of men and women. It fully shows the dominant and passive actors in this relationship. It is also completely consistent with the character setting and plot logic. Moreover, this section is just the transition between the campus chapter and the city chapter on the normal timeline, which is wonderful. When they met again in the city line, Xiaoci had grown up a lot and was no longer passively restricted by her original family. The rainy season that once bound her had dissipated over the years, and those sharp voices became faint after growing up. Falling in love at this time was a natural thing for Xiaoci. She was finally able to accept another person's life and accept another person entering her life, which corresponds to her intention to "warm a stone heart." Let's talk about the line of the second male lead. I think Xiao Ci has projected onto him part of the freedom that she and her younger brother did not have. Xiao Ci and Cheng Han are two examples of the misfortune of the original family. One is due to parents' negligence, and the other is losing their parents when they were young. They seem to be in the same predicament, but in fact they are in contrast to each other. Xiao Ci and his brother have parents but no freedom, while Cheng Han does not. Parents have freedom. Of course, Jin Ci is a very good person, so she is so dedicated to her friends. But I personally feel that in Xiao Ci, the spring that her brother could not have, the rolling grass on the hillside, the rainbow, balloons, puppies... And ice cream that she could not have... She projected onto Cheng Han, but it was not a compensation, it was a blessing. Finally, there is the line between Xiaoci and her family. There is no reason for her parents to treat Xiaoci badly, and they may not even know that they are malicious towards her. It is a kind of inertia. Regarding parents and Xiaoci, this is the second best part of the whole story except for the part about car exhaust between a man and a woman. There is no exciting plot, and there is no plot about parents regretting anything, because I feel that "when you no longer expect their love and recognition, you will close your position in this losing bet." Finally, I want to end with the author's original words: "In fact, humans and ephemera are quite similar. They think that once they love hard enough, they will die. But in fact, not loving is the real loss of the meaning of life." Ps: It's hard not to fall in love with the author after reading this book. Xiao Cizhen's core is very powerful for being able to describe a female character so vividly.

You can always find different surprises after re-swiping it

Runyi's favorite oolong tea [Star Eye]

I replayed Xiaoci through time machine in a loop~ It's different from the serialization. I read it in one go and got a new feeling. Please keep writing the stories you want to express, Xiaolu~