Reunited with Six Exes on a Wilderness Dating Show

Q: What's it like being forced to live with your exes?

A: Thanks for the question. I could keep my secret identity hidden from one or two of them, but when all six show up at once, I'm the most wronged person of the year. What did I do to deserve this... I really want to poison the congee so we can all die together after eating it!

-Update-

Since everyone wants to know, here's a quick rundown.

Ex No. 1: A cute younger schoolmate from high school with bright eyes and puppy-dog energy. He suddenly went abroad, so we broke up.

Ex No. 2: A handsome librarian at my university. I thought he'd be a gorgeous top, but he was a bottom, too. We weren't compatible, so...

Ex No. 3: A coworker who looked refined and aloof, but was actually a perverted gay guy. The company found out, so we broke up and both quit in one fell swoop.

Ex No. 4: Maybe he doesn't count as an ex. He used me to reminisce about his first love. He was mature, rich, and considerate, but he always said I was fat :)

Ex No. 5: My personal trainer. Thanks to him, I went from a slightly chubby pretty boy to a premium-grade hottie. But he was too rough, and my butt hurts so much. I'm not a masochist, so bye-bye!

Ex No. 6: The biggest player of them all. I knew, and he knew I knew. Later, I moved, and hooking up became inconvenient, so I deleted him.

P.S. I will not get back together with any of these exes.

-I'm begging you-

I made the story up, so don't try to match it to anyone.

There is no real-life inspiration. Stop tagging people, please!!

-Whatever, bring it on-

Yeah, I'm Zhou Shengyao from Love in the Wilderness.

So what? I'm coming clean!!!

Let me say this again! I had no idea beforehand. The production crew #^&%@#!

Who knows if this is a script or if they just want to make things a mess. Either way, I don't love any of them!

[The livestream hits a new record for viewers today]

Viewer: I'm sending Yao Yao planes and rockets! Don't look back. Let them burn at the crematorium, let them burn!!!

Viewer: The three best things in the world: competing for a love interest, betting on ships, and the crematorium trope.

Viewer: And shipping them! I'm all in on the younger puppy-like guy today!

Viewer: Only kids have to choose. Adults want Yao to give everyone equal attention. Remember to turn on the livestream when you do it (doge).

Viewer: Quit talking and go to camera 3! High definition, no censoring!!

[Reading guide]

1. After losing weight, the bottom is unbelievably gorgeous. He used to have a little baby fat. He now works as a voice actor, has maxed-out wilderness and cooking skills, and is a mischievous heartthrob adored by everyone.

2. Lots of rivals competing for him and plenty of dramatic showdowns. Everyone is into the bottom.

3. The main love interest misunderstands him the most, is the best-looking, dotes on him the most, and is also the most scheming. If you can't accept how harsh and awful he is to the other tops, please leave quietly. No need to tell me, thanks :)

4. The replacement-lover trope only applies to Jin Shizhe. I won't reveal why, since that would be a spoiler.

★Preorder: Reborn as a Tycoon! I Built a City of Beauties

You suffer from an extreme case of beauty obsession and feel miserable when you can't see beautiful people. After transmigrating as a tycoon, your obsession remains.

To stay alive, you build a skyscraper and recruit beauties from the entertainment industry. You assign one floor to each person according to their looks, and live on the first floor. Every morning, you ride the sightseeing elevator, admire all kinds of beauties, and then go eat at the rooftop restaurant.

In just six months, the skyscraper is full, and the original owner's eating disorder is cured.

*

A year later, your beauty obsession starts acting up again. The reason is that all these young celebrities are starting to look alike: pale, young, and skinny. You're tired of the same old look.

By contrast, beauties from other professions are more therapeutic: refined and gentle teachers, muscular, dark-skinned duck-neck snack shop guys, restrained dentists in white coats... So you start gathering handsome men from every profession as medicine for your illness, and build one skyscraper after another.

The local planning bureau asks what you're doing. You don't want to reveal your medical history, so you lie and tell them, "I'm planning a small town."

The town will have everything it needs, including healthcare, entertainment, restaurants, and education. The planning bureau thinks your blueprint is great and will help promote urban development, so they invest over a billion.

That amount is nothing to you, but with official approval, you can expand your town into a city. You even become its mayor and build a tower in the city center that reaches the sky, so you can look at whichever beauty you want.

*

Your City of Beauties becomes the world's hottest tourist destination, bringing in hundreds of billions in annual revenue. You single-handedly push the whole country's GDP to number one in the world.

Of course, that achievement is nothing to a tycoon like you.

The important thing is that gorgeous men and women of every kind flock to your City of Beauties from all over the world, and your beauty obsession never flares up again...

Theme: Remember how hard the farmers work for every grain of rice.