Football: The Milan Legend

Pre-release: Football: The Big Dreamer. Moms, come enjoy: a serial ex-wife collector, everyone's unattainable crush, a football-world octopus, adorable little Ottie... Completed works: The Wealthy Club Captain Wants to Retire, Football: The Big Brain, and Football: The Perfect Striker are in my column. Synopsis: Gadir: living legend, god-tier time manager, triple-threat superstar, the first person to buy a club and play for it, a heartthrob who never falls too deep, a true player, no surname, and one secret One day, when he was sixteen, a voice suddenly spoke to him: “Hey, hello. I’m the god you believe in.” “...Who?” “I’m the god you believe in from a parallel universe. I’d only been looking after him for eighty-odd years when he died. I was so heartbroken that I decided to come look after you.” Gadir: ...Huh? “I’ll make all your wishes come true. You’ll achieve fame and success, be loved forever, and have a smooth life, worshipped like a myth... And then you’ll live a little longer. Don’t go dying at just a hundred years old.” Gadir gave up. He’d never realized that “he” was so greedy. Wanting to live a long, happy life was one thing, but he even thought of himself as a god. Gadir immediately decided to see a therapist. But no matter how many good doctors he tried, he never managed to cure his hallucinations. Instead, he began to realize that this “greedy version of himself” seemed to be a big help. In Milan, a cosmopolitan metropolis, fashion people wondered why the popular model Gadir was juggling a football on set, while football people wondered how AC Milan’s young prospect had suddenly appeared on the runways of Fashion Week and the covers of major magazines. Gadir, who was modeling the face of Dorian Gray for the Hollywood film The Picture of Dorian Gray, blinked in surprise. “Obviously, it’s because I can play football and I’m gorgeous. And I’m a master of time management.” The god floated behind him, reminding him to use the time he had to review his schoolwork. “You really are a master of time management. How did you manage to play a U21 match yesterday, have private dinners with Kaka, Sheva, and Pippo all at the same time, and still come back to watch a movie with me?” Maldini, AC Milan’s officially designated and sole caretaker of Gadir, as well as the team captain, asked helplessly as he cut Gadir’s bread. “Because I love football, and everyone! I worked hard!” Gadir answered earnestly, looking at Maldini, and the transparent version of himself behind him. “Watch the time. The car will be here in five minutes,” the god reminded him. Gadir didn’t think he was the ball hog and heartbreaker everyone made him out to be. He just liked collecting victories and spoils, and, as a bonus, beautiful people and beautiful love. What’s wrong with a player being strong enough to knock his opponents down on the pitch? What’s wrong with a player being skilled enough to make his opponents cry with frustration? What’s wrong with a player being good enough at fighting to punch an opposing player out on the pitch? ...Okay, that one really does seem wrong. Gadir guiltily patted Ibrahimovic, then picked him up off the ground and carried him away. And finally, what’s wrong with a pretty boy being so beautiful, sweet, and irresistibly charming that everyone loves him? “Nothing at all. They’re lucky to love you, and the more they love you, the luckier they get. I’m a good god, not some freeloader,” the hallucination said, floating up to the ceiling. I’m really going too far. Being greedy is one thing, but constantly imagining I’m a god? This is bad. Gadir shook his head. By the time he realized it was all real, he had already become a living legend entirely through his own efforts. “What? I really was blessed by the gods?!” Bonus scene: “Have you ever felt your sexuality wavering? Honestly, yes. He’s a footballer, and he’s also a model. I know you all know who I mean, haha. Yeah, I’ve imagined that if it were Gadir, his gender wouldn’t really matter... Hey, don’t laugh! He’s just so beautiful, sweet, and hot.” Hollywood superstar Leonardo DiCaprio said boldly during a talk show, amid the audience’s whistles. “He’s transferred a lot of his faith points to you. Great! Interact with him some more,” the god said happily. What, is this really the kind of person I like? Gadir was shocked, but surely there was nothing wrong with following his heart? “What do you think of that statement? I think he’s absolutely right. Also, he’s incredibly sweet and hot.” The youngest-ever World Footballer of the Year and winner of that year’s American Teen Choice Award, Gadir, winked at the awards ceremony and deliberately responded to the movie star, setting off Hollywood’s biggest scandal of the year. P.S. 1. A brand-new IF storyline for the work Football: The Perfect Striker in my column. It starts from the beginning, so you can read it without having read that story. The main story starts at age eighteen. The fifteen-year-old bonus chapter is in the Milan IF series of The Perfect Striker. 2. The golden finger is ridiculously powerful. This is a no-brainer wish-fulfillment story: he sweeps up trophies for his club and country, works as a supermodel during breaks, and is the first person in the film industry to make a living off his face. AC Milan used to be a powerhouse, and with the protagonist joining, it stays one. Please think twice if that’s not your thing. 3. Almost everyone has a one-sided crush on him. The supporting character list isn’t complete yet. There’s a chaotic love-triangle free-for-all, but Gadir is a master of group battles and never gets caught out. Open ending, with no final pairing. Theme: Exploring every possibility life has to offer