Learning Obstetrics in a Pregnancy-and-Birth Script

[A nonsensical episodic series. Truly nonsensical! I write whatever comes to mind in my dreams. Before diving in, make sure you're in a stable state of mind, or it'll really mess you up!] Pu Yuhe plays a "simulation world" game. Players can choose their professions freely and earn coins by completing missions. Pu Yuhe is thrilled, but just as she picks a profession, she transmigrates... System: Please collect the game story cards. Once your character clears a stage, you can enter the next instance! Pu Yuhe: Huh? Game Mission 1: In a stand-in romance, you are the private doctor responsible for keeping the stand-in's baby safe. Pu Yuhe reads the plot summary. Good grief, it's got all the classic ingredients: the white moonlight and the chase-your-wife-to-the-crematorium trope. But why is the man who runs away while pregnant a guy? Wait, what the hell, how can a man get pregnant and give birth? Holding the story card, Pu Yuhe stares at the stand-in and ponders: A female Alpha and a male Omega? I haven't looked into that much. Let's see what happens... Game Mission 2: In a wedding-for-good-luck story, you are a miracle doctor tasked with keeping the crippled war god's princess consort alive. Pu Yuhe (with dark circles under her eyes): I guess I'm going to have to combine Chinese and Western medicine to become invincible... Crippled War God: If you can keep my wife and child safe, I'll grant you a lifetime of wealth and glory. Pu Yuhe takes another look at the story card. Huh? Why is this another chase-your-wife-to-the-crematorium story? Wait! You're the one who's pregnant, Crippled Guy? Game Mission 3: In an apocalypse story, you are a medic who must fight for a happy ending. Pu Yuhe: Finally, it's not a crematorium story!!! Then she comes across an injured man. Pu Yuhe: ...Don't pick up strange injured men!! [Runs off at lightning speed] Then the strange man wakes up and corners her in an alley. "Did you sneak up on me?" Pu Yuhe: I was just passing by!! The strange man moves toward her, then suddenly retches... Pu Yuhe (gravely): Oh no, you're pregnant. Don't be scared, I'm a professional! Spare my life and I'll make sure you and your baby are safe! Strange Man: ... After countless instances... Pu Yuhe (utterly hopeless): Why haven't I cleared the game yet!!! I can't take it anymore!! Who wrote this plot? Just let me go home! In the final instance, she slowly wakes up in a hospital bed and sees a familiar face sitting beside her, peeling an apple. Man: You're awake? Want some hot water? Pu Yuhe glances at the identical rings on her hand and his. Her vision goes black. What? I married an NPC in the end? Pu Yuhe (with difficulty): Are you carrying my baby? Man (tenderly): Mm-hmm. Pu Yuhe faints. Author's Note: 1. The female lead is role-playing a character. She's not actually a doctor, but she still works hard to learn out of respect for life. The author has tried to research everything, so please forgive any inaccuracies. 2. This is a nonsensical episodic series with no big boss. My made-up settings are everywhere, all the characters who give birth are men, and I write whatever setting comes to mind. Once I've run out of cheeky lines, the story is over. 3. One-on-one romance, both leads have no prior partners. The male lead appears early but has little screen time until later. ---- A preview of my next no-romance female-led story, The Rainbow Jade Wedding Company, Serving Furry Customers. Please add it to your favorites! ---- Fu Cai takes a job as a wedding emcee out of financial necessity. "Rainbow Jade Wedding Company?" Fu Cai hesitates. "Cai bi..." Why does that sound so miserable? Could they go out of business the day after opening? Fu Cai closes her eyes and tremblingly steps into the little storefront, barely thirty square meters in size. Her dear older cousin, Xu Bi, the company's only other shareholder, has gone out to drum up business. She's in charge of watching the shop, and... "Welcome! How can I help you?" "Hello. I'm getting married next month, and I'd like to hire a wedding emcee, a band, and a wedding procession. Ideally, everyone should be strong and sturdy..." Fu Cai writes down every detail of the customer's request. Then she looks up. Wait, why does the customer have a colorful tail? No wonder her cousin invited her to join the company. The wedding company serves... a whole bunch of furry folk!! Fu Cai (sweating profusely): What should I do? Should I tell the customer to tuck their tail away first? No, wait. I'm a noble cultivator! I can do this and that, and then that and this... Xu Bi returns from a meeting with a client and sees his cousin squatting at the shop entrance, happily feeling for fish. He cries out in alarm: "Stop! Don't do that to a customer!" Fu Cai (looking at the half-eaten ear of corn still in her hand) (silently holds it out): Want some? Theme: Love is a journey for the brave