[Western Crossover] Jason's Wonderful Day

Jason Todd, in Gotham, just off the plane, has lost his memory for some unknown reason, but doesn't want it back. To avoid complicated family relationships, Jason passes on his tips for resolving family disputes to Peter, then embarks on a path from which there is no return: pulling character cards. Character Card 1: Tony Stark Passive Skill: I love you 3,000 times (Welcome to the great group hug and sobbing session.) Character Card 2: Bruce Wayne Passive Skill: A loving father and filial son, five bats at the door (Care for the lonely old bat. My youth flew away and never came back.) Character Card 3: Peter Parker Passive Skill: Poverty (Comes with a built-in catnip effect for rich guys.) Jason: ??? Is there something wrong with you people? Jason: ...All right, stop giving me character cards. I'll draw one myself. How do you use your abilities properly? Stop a lunatic from blowing up Metropolis, and keep the Smallville boy from changing color... Stop Iron Man from developing a whitening virus... Force the Dark Knight to tell the truth every time he opens his mouth, and solve his family problems... ++++ A recommendation for my completed novel ++++ Everyone Thinks Bruce Will Turn Evil [Western Crossover] One-line summary: The Batman Who Laughs reverses the past. ++++ A recommendation for my upcoming novel ++++ Mikael is human. In his time, Heaven and Hell wage war on Earth, Yahweh hides inside a temple, a world-ending flood sweeps across the land, angels walk among humans, and devils run rampant. Humanity trembles, homeless and wandering from place to place. [Hello, human. Which side do you choose?] Mikael: ...Heaven, I guess. [The proud angels refuse to accept you.] Mikael: Then Hell. [The mighty forces of Hell don't take in trash.] Humanity: It is a pity to have been born human. Mikael: Please, can we be serious? Is there any way to save my life? Humanity: Close your eyes and love no one. Mikael: ...And then? Humanity: Then pray :) Confronted by all kinds of bizarre angels and demons, and with an image of Michael shoved right in his face, Mikael decides to choose death. So he burns the archangel's relics, digs up the grave of the saintly Messiah, smashes the Devil King's altar with a single sword strike, and even steals a little statue. The statue is beautiful and sweet. Three meals a day, cuddles and kisses, and every so often, he plucks a feather. Far away in Hell, the Devil King suddenly notices his wings are shedding. And his statue is in the arms of a human with black hair and black eyes, who looks a lot like Michael, the archangel who once ran him through with a sword. Lucifer: ... Lucifer: Wait. Lucifer: Isn't that my ex?! Theme: I hope everyone who pulls character cards can stay calm and at peace.