[Nirvana in Fire] I'm Done Acting in This Play!

[This is purely for fun, purely for fun, purely for fun. I'll say it three times because it's important. Since this is just for fun, I haven't planned out what to write. I'll just write whatever seems entertaining, and if I don't feel like writing anymore one day, that'll be the end of it. Also, since I'm writing this for fun, the plot may not connect or make sense from one part to the next, so please keep that in mind when reading.]

Alternate title: Everyone Knows the Plot, Except Me, and I Don't Know They Know

In Nirvana in Fire...

Emperor Liang (The Jade Emperor): Xia Qing, why doesn't Jingyu rebel? If he did, I could retire and enjoy my old age.

Shrimp Paste (Lu Xia): ... (What the heck? Weren't you supposed to be power-hungry enough to kill your own son and best friend?!)

Prince Yu (The Fifth Crown Prince): Chief Xia, how can I get my big brother to like me? Once he ascends the throne, I can become a carefree prince and loaf around like Uncle Prince Ji.

Shrimp Paste (Lu Xia): ... (What the hell! Weren't you supposed to be sinister and ruthless, pretending to be kind?)

Xie Yu (The First Crown Prince): Chief Xia, help me steal Consort Jing away as my wife, and I'll be your weapon. How about it?

Consort Jing (The Eldest Princess): Get lost! If you dare say that, Mother Goddess will beat you to death! Are you trying to give yourself away early? How are we supposed to keep this play going?

Shrimp Paste (Lu Xia): I'm done! I'm not acting in this play anymore!

Theme: